Monday, August 6, 2012

"You treat me like a dog"

 25 April 2012

Favourite Cake Ever! Bar One Cake

2nd birthday cake, Caramel, not much to blog about

Just after my birthday, i got a call from an old friend of mine, not the one I was going to move in with. Let’s call this friend NS and the other one ZS. She got a new job and was stood up by someone that was going to host her until settled down. I picked her up at the bus stop, we went over to mine and reminisced. She’s a good, genuine friend, I love spending time with her.
KFC and Chicken Licken! That's what happens when you shop on an empty stomach

I moved out of my apartment, the last week of April. I tell you, I’ve called more than 25 places home in my entire lifetime and that was the hardest good bye (to a home) for me! I cried! I was overwhelmed with emotion, you know? It was a lot of things, I’d only been back home for a month, from Georgia, which was another roller-coaster, when I had to move to Johannesburg, 2months later, I had to move again. There was just too much uncertainty around me, too much instability. Of course, I had no intentions of staying with a friend forever. It was nice to kknow that i had a place to stay until I figured out my next step. I am not one to depend on people, even though, my friend needed me there for the diet thing, for those that didn’t know, I was Miss Weighless  Gauteng year 2002. I know! I know! I know! J
My family calls me The Queen of Junk Food. I wonder Why?

I moved in with my friend on a Wednesday or Thursday.  We weighed ourselves on Friday and got started eating right! We weighed ourselves every Saturday since then. A week since moving in with ZS, Her friend who is a doctor was looking for a receptionist for his rooms. My friend told me about it, she had already told the Doc that She knows just the person for the job, unfortunately my US plans were under way, I was going to leave in a month or two. Even though,I was excited to be working, about the idea of having something to do while waiting impatiently for my US plans, I felt like taking on a job was so stable,as if I was intending to stick around for a while. We agreed that Doc would hire someone else and have me train that person as I have tons of experience in that field.
The two on the left are my Hard drives, the other 2 ex boss' 

I got the job! Well, I only found out 4days later! Fourways is not a place for pedestrians! I had to walk 30 minutes to the boom gate, we lived in a gated community. Then hail a taxi to work. I worked in Carstenhof Clinic from May onwards. My boss was a gem! The best boss anybody could ever ask for! What a breath of fresh air from the monster I worked for previously! It was just Doc and I in the rooms (well, and the cleaning lady who came in once a week, she was sweet too, we got along), he had his own room, with a consultation room, my  office, the waiting area and some type of a conference room. The rooms were amazing! So gorgeous! He has great taste too! I had wonderful times in Carstenhof, I won’t lie to you! Best few weeks of my working life! I looked forward to being at work. 
My niece and nephew say I'm a hippie from how I sometimes dress

I got paid end of the month! Whew! First actual salary since Georgia! Thank goodness!
At home, I lived with ZS, her daughter, the lady taht looks after the daughter, let’s call her P. Just the four us. ZS had friends over a lot though, so there were always lots of other people, which didn’t bother me, some of the friends, I knew, some I didn’t but they were nice people.  I had to give living with ZS a great deal of thought as I didn’t want it to ruin our friendship, we had been friends since 1989, so yeah. You don’t want to mess that kind of friendship up!
ZS’s place has 2 lounges, P and the daughter use the one lounge to watch TV and stuff, I used the other one because we liked different shows, I enjoyed DSTV channels, P liked SABC stuff and Nigerian movies. I didn’t want them changing the channel  for me when I could just use the other TV. I try and stay out of people’s way when I live with new people, so that i don’t cause any unnecessary awkwardness.
I bought and prepared the diet meals myself, P was handling hers and the kid’s. I noticed that whenever they ran out of stuff, she wouldn’t tell her ZS instead, she would take some of the diet stuff. That was so frustrating because when I did grocery shopping, I had already pre-planned what I would cook for the weak. It came to ZS’ attention, she suggested, we keep our diet stuff in a separate cupboard. Even though i didn’t want it to come to that, I thought that was fair.
One Saturday, I went to the kitchen and found the cooking oil that was in our cupboard all messy, with oil all over the bottle and you could see it had been used:
Me: P please, can you not use the stuff I buy for ZS and I?
P: LIKE WHAT?
Me: Any and everything I get for us, if you run out of things, please let her know of do like you used to before I got here.
P: I WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT COS I CAN SEE THAT YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ME. I’VE BEEN WATCHING YOU! YOU ALWAYS TALK TO ME LIKE YOU’RE TALKING TO A DOG. I KNOW THAT I’M JUST A MAID HERE, BUT YOU SHOULD STILL RESPECT ME. I SEE HOW YOU NEVER SIT WITH ME IN THE LOUNGE, COS YOU THINK YOU’RE BETTER THAN ME. Blah blah blah blah!
Me: It seems like you’ve had isues you needed to address with me for a while, I wish you had sat me down and talked to me about them because now you’re  taking something really innocent and turning it into something it’s not-
P: NO SIS BABES! I WON’T LET YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT ANYMORE, I AM TIRED OF YOU AND YOUR ATTITUDE........
Me: I’m not having this conversation with you right now. Anyway, you got the message. ( I told her walking away to my bedroom. The daughter was watching TV with her friend in the lounge, we were in the open plan kitchen right next to them, P was yelling at the top of her voice).
I went to my bedroom and closed the door behind me. She budged in, crying, pointed at me and yelled and yelled and yelled. I got up and told her she can have the room if she wants it because I am trying to get some privacy from her and she just wont let me. I left and closed the door behind me, with her inthe room.
She came out, howled and howled, crying, and talking on the phone. I overheard her saying she couldn’t stand living under the same roof as me any longer, she couldn’t stand the way I treaded her and wanted to leave. She wanted whomever she was talking to on the phone ( I assume ZS) to send her a car, she was leaving. Her closet was in my bedroom,  (so Georgia, right? ) she went in there and started throwing her clothes on the floor, crying. You could tell she was fuming.  I didn’t like where the whole thing was going. I had to think. Fast. I opened my side of the closet and went, “you know what? Stay, I’ll move out! You can have this room”
ZS gave me that :)

I had promised the kids I’d drop them off at the movies. The daughter overheard P telling someone over the phone that I was moving out. She (daughter) came running to me crying, she begged me not to leave, telling me I’m like a mother to her. That touched me. I dropped them off at the movies, went back home, packed my suitcases. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve packed in the past year. My gosh! When P Saw me packing, she stopped. USA trip was around the corner, I had to be packed for that, so packing wasn’t a waste of time J . I didn’t see ZS for the next 2-3days, even though she did come home. That made things awkward! I was looking forward to discussing the whole thing with her. I had already secured a place to crash, with NS should I end up having to leave, of course, I wasn’t going to wait for ZS to kick me out but I would read between the lines. If I had had a chance to talk to her, but not seeing her, wasn’t helping. I also didn’t want to force her into talking about something she wasn’t ready to talk about because She came to my room every night after work when she came home, this time she didn’t. I assumed she needed spave and I gave it to her.
The Niece and The Nephew

ZS and I kinda talked about this a few days later, I had to give her a summarised version of my side as she was rushing to work. I was over it by then anyway.
Just before I left my Melville apartment

last meal before the diet

The day I cut my dreads, what a mission to undo all this
.