Happy Camper

Calvin had a week off work where he decided to take me on vacation. It was going to be our first trip together. I was so excited! I loved the direction our relationship was going. Wouldn't you?

I packed a carry on luggage full of stuff  for the week and a small overnight back. I washed my car and headed on out to my Calvin's. I was so excited, I always have been whenever I was going to meet him; which had been every weekend since we met for the first time. Nice record. I have dated people in the past who were never available on weekends.

Brian, my airbnb guest was still staying at my house but was becoming more of a nuisance. The vacation couldn't have come at a better time, quite honestly. Not that there's ever poor timing for  vacation. I didn't tell Brian I was going out of town. It was none of his business. Also, you never know what people might get up to, knowing you were going to be away for a week.

Calvin planned that we would go camping by the beach on San Clemente. I had never been there before and hadn't camped in forever! Being n arborist, he had a bunch of wood from the trees he had been trimming, we took that with us, he also has very warm and thick sleeping bags and a tent. He is pretty outdoorsy, so it's only second nature that he would have that kind of stuff handy. I took my sleeping bag along as well. You can never be too prepared, right?

I arrived with my silver spinner suitcase, Calvin had his silver suitcase packed. I was surprised at how we both had similar suitcase. Poor coincidence!

We loaded my SUV, I posed for a few selfies and hit the road, Jack!

Notice our silver suitcases in the bottom

We both loaded the truck together, I pride myself in being good at packing. Having moved as many times as I have, it comes with the territory. Calvin thought of everything. He put water in the cooler for us and of course brought his skimboard. We were going to the beach after all. There it is in green below.

Let's go! 

We started at the gas station by Calvin's house. He bought a few snacks. We did have lunch before we headed out. He prepared something for both of us. I ate as soon as I got there, within an hour, we were on our way. Right on schedule! We were both psyched!

It was a nice two or so hour drive to San Clemente, Orange County. We drove to the campground, booked a spot, the one we wanted was already taken or something, so the lady was nice enough to move us to one with an awesome view of the ocean. Man! So cool!

View of the ocean from campground

I was jumping up and down for joy with how everything was falling into place. As soon as our camping spot was booked, we set up our tent, which was much simpler than I thought it would be.

Cute tent for two

After setting up the tent, we went out for pizza down the street at a pizza joint where they also brew their own beer.

Ready for pizza!

The pizza was really good. I asked for one with as much meat variety as possible while Calvin was ordering exotic beer.

Deliciousness!

We also had chicken wings with our pizza. So good!

It wasn't a lot of food but I was full. Probably, mainly from excitement! Calvin bought himself a Pizza Port beer mug. From Pizzaring, we headed out to the beach. We did so much that day, I can't believe we only had 24 hours! Calvin skimboarded. I took pictures and videos, you know the drill, haha. Soon, I will know how to do all these things and be cool too, you wait! I stepped into the water, because you have to! I love water, I just can't swim. I had shorts and flip flops on, so I was ready to go.

View from the parking lot

After all that, we went to the supermarket to get ourselves a few necessities; ice, juice, stuff to eat while staying there, red velvet cake for moi, etc ;)

Because I had to

San Clemente beach behind me

When we got home, we walked around the are to see what else was going on. There were a lot of campers,. I must say! Families, some people had two trucks, bikes, bicycles, it seemed like they lived there.

We went in the tent and chilled there for a second, when someone close by started playing nice music. This is not Beverly Hills, you can't be mad that someone's music is loud. We're on vacation, we're open minded. We had our own speaker, I had the iPod, but we turned ours on and enjoyed the neighbors music. He had a caravan/Trailer right next to us. Calvin went out for some reason and ended up talking to our neighbor. The neighbor asked if his music is too loud, we told him we love it. 

Around sunset, Cal called me to watch the sunset. 

So amazingly beautiful!

We stood outside our tench and took it all in. It was a moment, for sure! Neighbor invited us over to watch the sunset from his 'yard'.

Beautiful San Clemente Sunset

Neighbor had a lot of interesting things over there. He had a wooden statue from Indonesia, he refers to it as his wife. That was on the table and a lot of interesting things from his travels all over the world. He's a very nice guy, we were lucky to be posted next door to him.

The neighbor's wife!

Calvin made dinner, he had brought ground beef/minced meat from home, he made burgers out of that for all of us, including the neighbor.

Burgers for dinner

We had brought a camping type stove but the neighbor offered his, so Calvin used that instead.

Dinner time!

The burgers were delicious, we all loved them. Calvin is such a gem, I'd be lost without him. He comes in handy in all kinds of environments.

Neighbor offered some stuff from his own kitchen, pickles, etc to go with out burgers.

You know, the messier food looks, the better it tastes!

After dinner, they drank some exotic drinks. We all sat and chatted the night away. It was a really good day and night.

I got tired and went to bed, Calvin made fire for us to keep us warm through the night. 

I may have got up to quickly enjoy the fire 

As you can see, a great time was head by all!

Eventually, I went to sleep. Calvin sat outside by the fire and enjoyed the still of the night. Eventually, he woke me up. There was a skunk by our trash, he didn't want me to miss out. What? I've never seen a skunk in person. If I did, I must have been very young in the farm.

The skunk going through our trash

The thing didn't care how much noise we made or anything, it was focusing on what it was doing; licking those avocado peels. Calvin threw rocks near it to scare it away, hoping it wouldn't spray him with its smelliness. Did it move an inch? Nope! Only when it was done, did it walk away! Bye Felicia!

Fall Festival

My AirBnB Guest, Brian was getting comfortable, he was getting comfortable. This could be a good and a bad thing. I want all my guests to feel at home. I also want to feel at home in my own home. If their feeling home is going to infringe on my peace of mind, we have a bit of a problem! Brian never cooked so he never used the kitchen. He only used the living room, where he slept and the bathroom. He had long-ish hair that was falling off. I love his undercut hairstyle, it looked good on him. I just didn't like how the hair was clogging the bath tub and I didn't enjoy sweeping it off the bathroom floor. He took good care of himself. He shopped on Rodeo Drive and wore nothing by designer clothing and a bunch of Jordans. Good for him! Remember I mentioned that Brian used to book for a day, two, even three at a time? That story is here. He still did that, but his credit card was getting rejected after I accepted the booking. What would happen was that he would make a reservation, I would accept, he would pay, AirBnB would confirm payment, 24 hours later, Brian's card would be rejected. What on earth? I would take a screenshot of the notification about the rejected card and send it to Brian. He would then follow up on it 'with his dad'. That became a trend. I wasn't into that trend though, go get viral over there! I'm busy!

Brian was still buying new designer clothes, he would always show me his new Louis Vuitton Murses (man's purse) and all kinds of new stuff he was buying. But you owe me rent money, boo? He told me that his dad was in the hospital. I empathised with him but that story wasn't going to cut it when it was time for me to pay rent with the apartment management, was it? I still needed money in my bank account. Plus, you have a job, can you pay me with the money in your account and then have your dad reimburse you? Like why should this solution come from me? You're the one with a problem? You're the one shopping 24/7. What I liked about Brian was that he never brought guests over to my place. He would tell me that he will never tell women where he lives, 'you know how you guys are!' he would say. I'm like, listen, don't compare me to your women, I am in a league of my own. For example, between you and I now, I wouldn't date a guy who is sleeping on someone's floor. Especially a guy who can afford designer wear but doesn't prioritise his sht. Heck Nah!

Calvin is a churchgoing person. He is one of those guys! I haven't been to church since Vegas. I go sporadically. Well, I went sporadically when I did. I hadn't been for months. When you're in Vegas and find out there's a church right on the strip, not a wedding chapel but a full on church, you go! You check it out. Calvin had asked me to go to church with him. Not in an annoying, 'I would like to invite me to my church' type of way. I was honored he wanted to go to church with me, so of course, I went! Just an hour in and you're done! My kinda church! No offense to anyone who spends all day at church, I've done that too in Salt Lake. I told you all about it here. Day before church, Calvin and I were out and about. He had a few clients he needed to touch base with. I tagged along. We used his amazing 1965 truck. How could I say no? We ended up going to shop for a dress for me. Calvin paid for it. Yay me!

I wore my new dress and Calvin coincidentally wore a green shirt and black pants. We became that couple at church that day. You can spot a bit of that green and black dress in this post. After church, Calv bought us snacks at church. They sell goodies to raise funds which I think is a brilliant idea.

We have been to church a number of times together, we went to two different ones in Calvin's neighborhood and we went to the Cathedral downtown. That one is gorgeous. Whenever I am at church, it takes me back to boarding school where we went to church 7 days a week. I was there for 5 years. My uncle, may his beautiful soul rest in peace was a Bishop, so we grew up in church. I always think about him when I go to church. I literally have the service done by him in my head.

One weekend, there was a festival at the church, the entire weekend! I remember thinking to myself, it would be nice to go for a walk around the block with Calvin one of these days. Be it his block or mine, it doesn't matter! I arrived in the evening at Cal's, he suggested we walk to the festival. I couldn't believe it. We had been driving wherever we went. We had driven to that church on numerous occasions, all of a sudden, he wanted us to walk. Be careful what you wish for!

It was a nice walk. We walked around the church yard, it was packed! I didn't see that coming! I hadn't foreseen it being that big a carnival. There were rides and all kinds of things. We went on a ride, a very interesting ride. You stand against the wall, they turn it on, it speeds around and around, somehow it pushes people off the floor, so you end up in the sky, but against the wall. I tell ya, it's a trip! There is no gravity! You can stretch your arm out, it won't fall. Until the ride is over. I really enjoyed it.

Food Stalls at church

We had Vietnamese for dinner from the Festival, I tell you it was elaborate. They had different cuisines!

Vietnamese dinner

I couldn't tell you how long we were there for. We had such a nice time! On our way out, Calvin bought a painting of The Last Supper. I haggled the seller and won. It wasn't a real painting, the blown picture type. Calvin felt bad because it's church people. I was like, come on! This is what you do with street vendors, you negotiate! Plus, we saw one for the price I had asked for, that's where it all started for me. I just didn't want to pay more than I should. By I, I mean Calvin, cos I wasn't paying for sht.

We walked back to the house. It was already late.

The following day, we went to the Festival again. This time, Cal's friend had dropped by, we took him along. I drove. I had wedges on, so I took them off to drive. We struggled to find parking because everyone was at the festival. Finally, we found a spot where someone had just left. Cal was so sweet, he got out of the car to help me parallel park. After that, I got out of the car, as I was trying to buckle my sandals, Calvin went down on his knees just like on our first date and was like, I got it, babe! Ugh, how can you not melt?

Filipino food at the Carnival 

I wanted something different, as I always do, for day two, so I had Filipino food. Looks similar to the Vietnamese dish, doesn't it?

Halo-Halo... Filipino desert

Enjoying Halo-Halo

Calvin invited his friends over to his house, while at the Carnival, he bought some food for everyone.

$80 worth of assorted meats

The picture doesn't do the meat justice. That's a heck of a lot of meat. If it's $80 at a church event, you know it costs even more in real life. It was so good too! While waiting for our meat, we had some more dessert. Well, Calvin and his friend, I was too full.

Funnel Cake

I did taste the cake though. I had never seen or heard of it before. It tastes good. If like me, you have never heard of it, that is not ketchup/tomato sauce on top, it's strawberry topping. 

at the festival

While eating funnel cake, waiting for our large meat order, we were approached by Bingo people. They offered us free Bingo tickets. We went into the hall and payed Bingo. It was the first time for all of us. None of us won anything but we enjoyed it.

Bingo!

After Bingo, we picked up our meet and sides. The owners of the stall were so chuffed, they asked to pose with us for their websites. We obliged, Calvin's friend was like, I'll pass. 

Back home, we headed! 

A Letter from The Ex

I was nice and tired at work, what with not getting enough rest cos I was busy being wooed by Spotty.

The following day, he picked me up from work,he dropped me off at mine and asked me to call him when I got up, to which I told him to call me after pm. I wasn't gonna be the girl who calls a guy she just met up. He called as I got up around . He came to pick me up just to go hang at his. He made us lunch, I had mentioned that I like pork so he made pork, green beans and macaroni. Tasty! He put cushions on the floor right by the coffee table. That's how we were seated for lunch. It was pretty cool. We could have sat in the kitchen at the counter on the high chairs, but  I liked his idea better.

He played more I'm gonna make you love me type music. I enjoyed his music, old, motown music. I took an hour's nap before work in his bed. He hung out in the living room while I slept. He woke me up when it was time to get ready and took me to mine to freshen up and dropped me off at work. Work was  minutes drive from my place. I used to walk there all the time, 25 minutes walk. I enjoyed it. By the time I got to work, I would feel nice and fresh.

We kept doing that, him picking me up from my place in the afternoon to hang out at his place. It got to the point where he told me to take my uniform with me when I went over to his and my toiletries so I could shower at his. I  did that. Sometimes he would have to work and leave me at his sleeping, to go drive someone around or something and then go back to his. He paid attention to the things I like, one afternoon, he took me to the stores to buy chicken. He was going to make us something to eat. He also bought me Red Velvet cake. That was very sweet of him cos if you know me, you know how much  I love red velvet cake.

He called me one afternoon, I was grocery shopping, he asked if I needed a ride. I told him I as ok, I had a bus pass. I didn't want to be a burden. He offered to pick me up when I was done. He showed up in the limo! Smooth, Spotty, very smooth!  I had flip flops on, sweat pants and a wife beater. I felt so under dressed.

We hung out at my place, he watched a little tv. I treated us to dinner. You know me, I don't cook. We went out for take out. We enjoyed dinner while watching TV. He always told me not to fall in love with him. He told him that the problem with some of the girls he dated in the past was that they fell in love. He is not ready for that. He likes to take his time. I told him to worry about himself, he may have already been in love with me. I'm amazing! I told him, jokingly.

One Saturday, he took me to the park. It gets really busy over there over the weekend. They have people playing drums, kinda like African drums, they show off their eclectic skills like juggling, playing with snakes etc. There's a lot of pot smoking too. Spot made us lunch, he had bought me grapes the previous day, he himself doesn't eat fruit and vege. He packed me some grapes, made us chicken nuggets, from scratch and some chips. It was a very neat picnic! He brought along towels, small blankets, water, camping chairs, the works. How do you not fall in love with someone like that, right? Well, you don't! Someone tells you not to fall in love with them, YOU DON'T FALL IN LOVE WITH THEM, simple as that.

Se spent the entire day there, he had picked me up around ten in the morning. We left around 5 to go chill some more at his place, I took a quick nap there before work, took a shower and he dropped me off at work. My phone battery died that night. I had it charging while switched off. Turns out he had taken the bike for a ride, came by my work to say hi, I missed the call because my phone was off. He didn't want to be that weird guy who knocks on the door of a nursing home at 2 o'clock in the morning. I wish he did, I could've used the distraction.

As you might recall, I didn't have a bed in my room. Well, I still didn't!Needless to say, Spotty wasn't allowed in my room. Living room and kitchen only. And bathroom if need be but that's it Mr! He always wondered why he wasn't allowed in my bedroom. I would just smile in return. No comment.

My Landlords, who are the best human beings I have ever met in America, Bless them, hooked me up! My roommate, who was never home, the daughter of the owners of the condo, told her parents that I was sleeping on the floor. I was looking for a bed but I had to have a truck to pick it up #AintNobodyGotTimeForThat! Roommate's mom offered me her late aunt's bedroom suit. I thought that was really special. They delivered it themselves and helped me set it up. Beautiful people, inside and out. They were like parents to me as well. I love them to bits!

I already had bedding, heck I even had Martha Stewart sheets. All that was missing was the bed. She bought me a dresser, chests of drawers, the whole shebang! She even put nice paintings and matching lamps in my room AND she gave me matching linen. Everything was matchy matchy. I was so happy. I made my bed up and when Spotty came over, I took him to my room. He was like, finally! The bedroom! He thought my room was kinda cute, of course it was! It was new! I wasn't gonna tell him that obviously!

He asked me out on a date one Sunday. I agreed. I had Sundays off. He picked me up that evening all dressed up. He had knee high cowboy boots, gotta love a man in heels. And boots, nice combo. Real men wear boots anyway ;) Real men also wear Calvin Klein underwear. Just saying! He told me the destination was a surprise. I had knew high boots as well, and a top which I used as a dress, shhhhh! We walked down the stairs hand in hand, he always held my hand. We used the old, dusty one. I had grown used to it by then. Every now and then he would bring out the Limo but that was our full time ride.

We went for a nice drive on the freeway, it was nice! He wasn't that talkative, I had to ask him a few times if he was ok. We stopped midway to watch the sun set. He drove up the hill, where he usually watches sunsets. It was very romantic. We sat there looking at nature. I enjoyed that. We proceeded for our surprise destination. It was a bar/restaurant, they had live music; a couple who sang very well. It was so packed, we had to stand for a while before a table cleared out for us. Even then, we joined other people at that table, there was no time to wait for our own table, we were both heels, we needed to sit haha.

We had Chicken and Waffles. He thought the combination was rather bizarre. I had heard of the combo but never had it, so I thought what better time than then to try it out. They brought it out with Syrup for the waffles. I had a piece, he had a piece. He promised me he will never eat that ever again. I promised him I will. Every now and again, I would jokingly tell him to sit closer to me, I wasn't going to bite him. I felt some tension here and there, I wasn't feeling his body language at all that night.

Eventually, we drove home. His place. He doesn't allow shoes inside his apartment, we both took off out boots outside and went and sat on the couch. We had THE talk. He wanted to tell me that for some reason, the relationship wasn't going the direction he had wished it would. He didn't have the kinds of feelings he thought he should have at that point in our relationship. GREAT! Just my f*cking luck! I'm getting dumped! He fed me, now he's breaking up with me. How mean! I don't know whats better, getting dumped on an empty stomach or full.

I was like, hang on a minute! Are you breaking up with me? He was like, nooooooo, not at all, I am giving you a heads up. I thought you might want to know how we're doing, that's why I am telling you. I am also concerned that you might be falling in love with me. I was like, uhm, what!!!!!!! First of all, don't flatter yourself! Secondly, how can I fall in love with someone who is clearly not emotionally available, who reminds me constantly not to fall in love with him. thirdly, why are you doing all this things for me? Are you trying to get me to fall in love with you so you can break up with me and break my heart? What is it that you are doing exactly? He told me, well, kinda. I am hoping you will fall in love with me, but in my own pace. I don't want you to fall in love with me to soon.

It was the weirdest conversation I have ever had and I have had some conversations! I asked him where he was hoping we would be in the relationship and if he was still hung up on someone else. I knew he was still holding a torch for his ex, even though he wouldn't admit to it. He told me that he didn't have the feelings he wants to have for me. I was like, ok, so you hate me and you wanna break up? No, I need time! Then what's gonna happen when you realise that it's not gonna happen; you're not gonna fall in love with me? Then you're gonna break up with me, and be like b#tch, don't say I didn't warn ya!

He told me he likes everything about me, he wants to be with me for the longest time but he never wants to get married again. I want to get married, he doesn't know if that's one of the reasons he is holding back feelings-wise. I was like, hey! I wish I could say I don't want to get married, but I do. I have never been married and have always wondered what it would be like for me. I would like to experience it for myself. You have been married, don't you think it's unfair of you to want other people not to make the same mistake you did? Let me make this mistake, if it's not with you, I will make it with whoever wants to make it with me, but it's something I want to do. I wasn't trying to get the guy to marry me, but we were talking and it came up. I am not going to lie about my wishes to get a middle aged man who doesn't know what he wants out of life to like me. I'm sorry!

He asked me to read a letter that his ex who he was still hung up on wrote him. He had been asking me that for the longest time. I refused every time. I don't wanna hear it! I just don't. Don't ram in down my throat! That's what she said haha.

He was trying to prove to me how over it was between the two of them. I didn't care. I knew what I knew. Anyway, he practically begged me to read it, so I let him. What was the worst that could happen at that point, right? Was he gonna take me out and then come home and tell me he had no feelings for me? That had already happened. I sat there rolling my eyes while he went to get the letter. He sat on the floor in front of me and read it, then he read me his response which he never mailed to her. When he got to the part where he wrote her he will never find someone like her, he balled his eyes out! Middle aged me, crying like a girl!

I was sitting there thinking, the f#ck am I supposed to do now? I am the one who has just been dumped and he's the one who's crying, what a selfish s! I patted his shoulder, rolling my eyes. I really just wanted us to talk about us instead of him indulging in self pity over a love he lost TEN YEARS AGO! Get the Fck over it! ASAP! You're about to lose an amazing woman just cause you're so stuck in the past. Come on now!

He told me he wanted to see how things would go with us. He was willing to open himself up blah blah blah. He ruined it! He took what was supposed to me a nice, romantic date and fcked it up. He told me of all the relationships he had been in in the past ten years (after the break up), he had never been with someone who came close to the ex as he did with me. So much about me reminded him of her, he feels inspired to be that guy again, basically he was falling in love with me and for that reason, he was kicking me to the curb. How was that fair? How does that make sense to him? Or anybody for that matter. Does it make sense to you?