Sunday, January 27, 2013

24 Hours on Craig's List (more online dating)


“Single South African lady looking for love”  or something to that effect, I posted a picture or 3. As soon as I hit SUBMIT, the responses came flying in! I’d never seen anything like it! I got a message from, let’s call him Isra, an Israeli Guy who lived about 30 minutes from me.  Sent from my iPad was at the footer of his email. He included a photo of himself DANCING IN THE STREET WITH A WOMAN IN A RED DRESS! He had a hat on. I saw more the woman than him. I had to ask him for another picture. He soon sent it, he was in a garden of some sort, his feet were covered in plastic bags, he was with someone in the second picture as well, this time a man. They both were carrying their shoes. Clearly Isra didn’t take that many pictures by himself.  We emailed back and forth, for about an hour. He then told me  he was on his way to drop his son off at his ex-wife’s, we exchanged numbers. We arranged to meet up on his way back.
Frozen Green Tea, Never leave home without it

Crap! I had to freshen up! It was so hot, you cannot even imagine! I took a shower, fixed myself up. I couldn’t believe I was to meet someone I only started talking to in... what? Two hours? I was up for it. It was bored as heck. He called when he arrived at the Shoprite Parking lot. My pick up spot. He picked me up in his silver Toyota Prius. He asked where I wanted to eat, I wanted to go somewhere I hadn’t been yet, which wasn’t going to be that hard considering I was new around. We went over to a steak house. Our waiter, a middle aged man either had a crush on me, or I was revealing too much cleavage. He was dropping dishes, acting so nervous, I was embarrassed for him. Even Isra noticed. I had steak and fries. I enjoyed it. He had salad, and I can’t remember else. We were there for about an hour. Conversation was flowing smoothly. He told me about Israel, his life there, and here. He had been here for ten years and married that long too. He was newly divorced.
     
I suggested he dropped me home, before we ran out of things to talk about. We were the only people at the restaurant. He dropped me off and gave me a kiss on the cheek when I hugged him. He texted to thank me and to arrange date number two when he got home. I agreed. I thought he was a decent guy; different from anyone I’d ever dated. There’s something about him that intimidated me, just a little bit. I don’t know if it was the fact that he seemed richer than anyone I’ve ever dated. I was up for the challenge! We agreed to meet Monday night.


No word from him Monday all day, nor Sunday! I thought that was interesting, but ok. N, the roommate was home Monday night, I told her about Isra, she told me to text him a hello or something, so I did. He was apparently on his way to a meeting in New York, he promised to call me thereafter. I had a feeling he wasn’t serious and didn’t deserve anymore of my time. I was ready to go to sleep when he called around ten. He was only then on his way back from New York, we talked for about two hours. That’s how long the drive is from the city to Connecticut. He even talked to N for a bit, N lived in Israel for a few years. The actual number of years she lived there varies, depending who she is talking to, so whatever.

As soon as he got home, he just went, “ok, bye” and hung up. Uhm, what’s wrong with this picture? He had asked to take me out Wednesday. Tuesday, he texted me. I asked where we’re going to go, he said it was up to me, but it was going to be very late, so I had to choose wisely. I didn’t know what he meant by that. There I was trying to be all cute, telling him I had just the place in mind. In my mind, I was thinking of going somewhere by the beach. He asked me if I wanted to go to a hotel. I was like, er nope! Why? He said because that’s what your ad said! That you are looking for a f*ck buddy! Uhm, NO IT DID NOT! I wasn’t going to waste my precious time explaining my ad to that guy, I told him, sorry, he’s not what I was looking for. He told me I am a nice girl but we started off on the wrong foot, it would be weird if we tried going out as a couple.  I still think he is either married or lives with someone from the way, he hung up that night and how he only talked on the phone when he was on the road, never at home, he only texted or emailed when home.
     
One of the first guys to respond to my ad was Sam, he was Hispanic, he lived 30 minutes away from me, he worked as a carpenter Mon-Fri, was free Weekends, had his own car, lived with parents, his younger brother who in turn lived with his girlfriend. Very nice guy! He sent me a picture of himself with an NY  cap on, sitting on the floor behind a table. He would send me really long messages, that gave me an impression he was serious. I appreciated that. We chatted for a few days, before exchanging numbers. For some reason, he didn’t have enough money on his phone and had to call me only when home from his house phone. He was a nice guy.
  
WE agreed to meet the following Friday. WE probably started talking Sunday before that Friday. As we got closer to the meeting day, he got nervous, he went, ‘oh yeah, something  I forgot to talk to you about! How tall are you?’ I was like, well, average height, 5’3-5’4 (163cm). He said, ok good cos uhm, I’m kinda short, at least you won’t be that much taller than me. Ai ai ai, what am I going to do with this situation now! Ugh! I had to be nice, we were on the phone! I kept as straight a face as one can keep on the phone. I knew there and then it was going to be one of those Nicole Kidman / Tom Cruise Cases. I was going to have to wear flats on our date. A first for me! He said he was 5’2 (160cm).

I asked for a full lengthy picture, partly because he had seen mine and because I wanted to see how short he was. I knew in my heart of hearts I was never going to be Sam’s girl, but I had to find out how embarrassed I was going to be out with this person. No offense to shorter people, I am considered short myself, especially here. That’s not even why I wasn’t interested in him, he was just not the guy for me. He was 32 and had never been in a relationship. He had dated here and there, but never anything serious. Plus, I  want someone independent, not a 32 year old guy who still lives with his parents, his siblings and a sibling’s girlfriend. With all due respect to all those who prefer to live with their families.
   
He took a full length picture of himself while at work especially for me. Which was sweet. This was the day before our date. Too late to cancel, well, I wasn’t going to cancel because he seemed like a nice person, we could always be friends.
   
Friday came, he picked me up at the Shoprite Parking lot (yeah you guessed it) around 5pm. It had got a little cooler. His car was spick and span. He ran toward my side to shake my hand and open the door for me. He looked better in person, lookswise, but is really very short. He ran back towards his side and got us going. He played music off his phone, he somehow connected it to the car, so the sound was great. We drove for about an hour to the restaurant;  TGIF. Cool name! I was excited. Oh and I had my flats on. I must say, it’s rather comfortable to be on a date in flats. Very different.

WE found parking space, it was packed! He jumped out of the car, ran around toward my side to let me out. Then ran back to his to lock. We went in, suddenly I felt self conscious. Out of character for me, trust me, I have been on ‘dates’ with men twice my age. Men who did things on dates! WE found a nice table. They brought us out starters; tacos and sauce. He seemed nervous, he was sweating. You could tell he had showered but his hands still had a little bit of oil on them, especially around the nails. At least they were short. Which is more I can say about some of the guys I’ve gone out with. He dipped into the sauce, and double dipped eeewwwww! First of all, the fact that we ate from the same dish was already an issue with me. I don’t know this man, why am I eating from the same dish as he? And the double dipping? What’s next? Is he going to spoon feed me? God forbid! The waitress came around to take our order. He ordered FOR BOTH OF US! Uhm, What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I choose my own dinner? He caught me so off guard, I automatically went, ‘oh, you’ve already decided what I’m gonna have?’. He went, ever so nonchalantly, yeah, yeah hehehehe. Awkward moment for the waitress. She left, he seemed to have thought about it for a second, and went, ‘unless you wanted to order something different. Let me call her, ok, I’ll get her to come back’. No! No! No! It’s ok! I just assumed, I was going to make my own choice of dinner, it’s very thoughtful of you to order for me. You’ve been here before I’m sure you know what’s good. I didn’t mean it a word of that!
     
He ate and ate and ate, my appetite was ruined by the double dipping from earlier and the fact that he ordered for me. If you want me to lose interest in something, anything at all, take away my freedom of choice. This does not only apply to food. It could be something I like, if you force it down my throat, I stop liking it.I tasted here and there and took the rest home. I was tired and sleepy by the time we left the restaurant, more than anything else, I was bored and ready to go back to the apartment. He suggested we went and saw a movie. I told him, I would probably fall asleep. He insisted. Then he asked me what types of movies I was into AGAIN. I told him AGAIN. He asked if I had seen Batman: the dark night (again). I (again) told him no, and I am not into those kinds of movies. He said, “I’ve seen it. It was great! I’d see it again with you if you wanted to see it. But because you’re so sleepy, we’ll watch a comedy, that should keep you awake.” Deal! Aaaaand yawn.
    
The movie theatre was another 20 to 30 minutes from the restaurant. He burped all the way there. Bleh! We arrived at the parking lot, he told me to stay in the car, he was going to get us tickets, then come and get me. It would have saved us time to but the tickets together seeing as the next show was about to begin. He ran in and came out with two tickets for....... BATMAN; THE DARK NIGHT RISES! How many times did  I tell this man, I DID NOT WANT to watch this movie? Dear Lord! He was so excited, the show was about to begin, let’s run, he bounced over to my side to open the door for me. By now, I was so over it. There was something about him opening the door for me, that was super annoying.

                  
The movie theatre was freezing. Sam had a sweater on, I didn’t. It was the hottest summer I’ve ever experienced, I wasn’t about to walk around with a sweater (jersey). At some point, he let me use his sweater which was another ew moment, seeing as he was sweating so much earlier. And it was way too small to even wrap around my shoulders. He was enjoying his movie, I fell asleep within the first minutes. I remember waking up to him trying to quietly put his arm around my shoulder to ‘warm me up’. Awkward. This dude better not try to kiss me!

What seemed like ten hours later, the movie was finally over! Whew! I felt bad that I fell asleep through the whole thing. He could have just let me sleep in the car while he watched his movie for the second time on our first date. He wanted to show me around his neighbourhood, I really wanted to go home by then, I was dying! He took me home. He did that thing of running (more like bouncing) to my side to open the door for me. I hugged him quickly, to make sure, he didn’t gain access to my lips. From the way he was looking deep into my eyes, I could tell he wanted more than a hug. I got a kiss in the cheek and ran into the apartment. He texted me when he got home to thank me and to ask if we could meet again soon.