Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Fat Pig

Morning after passing out with Charlie at my place
Chicken tenders or whatever you wanna call them and fries and that cheesy bread thing

I was counting calories then, this meal was more than my quota for the day. Oops!

I couldn't finish the super thick milkshake, too full!
Above, is the breakfast Charlie and I had morning after the laundry

One morning, I was on my way downtown to donate plasma or blood. I left quite early because it can be packed over there, ain't nobody got all day just to donate plasma. I walked to the bus stop on the Strip. There was a lady already at the stop when I got there. I greeted her and stood next to where she was sitting. She seemed like she was a 'working girl', if you know what I mean. It doesn't bother me. It's not my body she uses for any of that 'work'. Not too long after I got there, this guy shows up in a blue Toyota SUV. He slows down and smiles at me. I politely smile in return. He drove off. Not before the lady fixed herself up as if to get the guy's attention. A minute later, a guy in a blue Toyota SUV, smiles, slows down and waves at me. I smile in return and take no note of the fact that it could be the same guy. A minute later, lo and behold the same bleeping guy comes back! I was just like, ok now, the fck is going on here? By then the lady had walked down the street, probably to avail herself in case that guy came back, which he did. When the guy came back for the third time, I was just like, no dude, I'm waiting for the buy, I am not selling anything. The heck!

I did what  I had to do at the blood place, they stab you with this ginormous needle and suck a whole lot of blood from you. It goes through a machine, which takes out the plasma and then returns the rest of your blood into your system. After all that, they bondage you like this...

My ashy arm. I was always ashy in Vegas, no amount of lotion was enough

Walking to the bus stop in the heat, I was sweating bullets. 

No jokes!  Desert heat!

I was walking towards the bus stop, minding my own business when...
Say it ain't so!
I tell you this is way in the afternoon! When I first saw this guy, it was in the morning! Then I saw him in a different part of town that afternoon. He pulled up at that parking and hollered at me. I turned around, took a picture of his car and asked if he's stalking. Silly question, of course! Like he's gonna tell me if he is, right? He told me he wasn't , it was a coincidence, he wanted to talk to him. I told him I was not interested. Fortunately, the guy who was sitting next to me at the clinic came by, I walked with him to the stop. I told him about that guy, he was like, Watch out for these Mexicans, they like black women. 

That's what happens when I show cleavage. This probably happens to most women. 

Me, that day.
That's not even a fraction of them, in real life haha! I got 99 problems, but a cup size ain't one of them. I write that because Jay-Z's song 99 problems just came up as I'm typing this lol.

I saw this at the clinic and liked it

Charlie and I continued chatting without seeing each other. One Afternoon, I wanted to go to the movies, Tony and I had agreed that we were going to see the movie, Blended together. I asked her that morning if she wanted to go, she wasn't feeling well, or something. Then turned around and told me she had just got home from buffet with this guy she was seeing, so I thought, I'd just go to the movies by myself; on my way there, I got lost and ended up right at the bakery. Of course, I went in! They had a dozen giant rolls on sale, I bought the brown and the white ones. I took them to the movies with me. I wasn't going to eat them in there, but I didn't have a car to leave them in. I tried to buy a ticket, the guy told me to leave my rolls in the car, food wasn't allowed in the theatres. Oy! He just wouldn't let me. I asked if I could leave them in the office, he was like, nope! I was so excited, I had already checked in on Facebook that I was at the movies. The guy let me stand there like a fool with two huge bags full of giant rolls. Eventually I left, my feelings were so hurt! I called my sister, she didn't pick up. Great! I walked towards the but stop, my sis called back. I was over it by then. We talked about other stuff, then I got a text from Charlie. He asked if I wanted to hang out at his place. His roommate had, apparently moved out. Finally.

I told him I was on my way home, he offered to pick me up. I took my God-forsaken rolls home, had one or two for lunch and Charlie came by. I offered him one of the dozens. He told me he had bread at his house. We rode to his place. It was my first time there. It's a one bedroom apartment, with a king size bed. I loved king size beds. I had a custom made one back in South Africa. Size is everything. We hung out and talked, then he took me to dinner. We just went around the corner and decided to try some Chinese place next door to his apartment. The food was divine over there, oh my goodness! 
They gave me a lot of meet too, see? Rice was on the side

I had pork, Charlie had beef, it came with rice. I know mine did. I always order rice, I seem to love it more and more everyday. The food was off the chains and the lady was so nice too. We Took the food home. We sat and ate and watched TV, it was really nice. 
My mango drink with those sweet, black round things whose name I always forget

I may have mentioned when Charlie was at my place that I didn't have my towels there, some of my stuff was at Chris' in LA. He was nice enough to store my stuff at his place for me at no charge. I did give him a whole lot of stuff in return, but he didn't want anything from me for keeping the stuff. I hadn't had a chance yet to get the rest of my stuff when I met Charlie. I mean, I practically met Charlie the same month I moved to Vegas. 

When I was leaving for my place, he gave me a brand new towel to use in the meantime. He gave me a stylus (those touch screen pens for your phone and tablet), his. I thought it was cute, he gave it to me and wouldn't take no for an answer. He also gave me pepper spray for safety. I have never had to use it, knock on wood! 
I may have snacked on half a tub of this Hazelnut spread at Charlie's. So good!

The stuff he gave me, of course I took a picture of everything! You're welcome!
He took me home, we hung out over there, lay on my tiny bed, nothing compared to his king size, and listened to music. We also watched my favorite morbid shows. The first 48. Which, if you haven't seen it, documents police as they try to make an arrest after the first 48 hours of a murder. Riveting show! My least favorite part is seeing the loved ones of the deceased. I hit mute when we get to that part. 

That afternoon, Charlie went back to his house to nap before he went to work that night. He sent me a random text about how his friend told him that I would never be faithful to him. I was like, why wouldn't I be? He said, the friend also called me this, that and the other. And that whole thing about the friend calling me a fat pig and Charlie defending me by saying, "She's MY fat pig!" At some point, I think the pressure of it all cause Charlie to ask me to lose 30 pounds. I told him I was already watching my weight, if he was going to tell me what to do with my life, he was going to mess up with my vibe. Like, don't tell a girl to lose weight, I don't care what your friends say! Otherwise, don't be with that girl!

After a few days, I sent Tony a text, asking how she was doing. There was this guy that she was seeing, long, complicated story but not mine to tell. I wanted to hear about that as well. She didn't reply. Oh well. One afternoon, she sent me a text, telling me how her feelings were hurt because she and I had agreed we were going to go to the movies together, next thing she knew, I checked in on Facebook that I was at the movies watching the very movie that she and I were going to see. That thew me completely off because, WHAT?!!?!?!?! She had told me she was sick and turned around and went out to a buffet, unless the buffet was at her house! I was glad she brought up her concerns but at the same time, I thought it was pretty weird considering her life wasn't at a stand still and I had to put mine on hold and wait for her. Plus, I never even got to see that movie. After I couldn't watch it at at the cinema, that very night, I got to Charlie's and downloaded the heck out of it online and watched it the very following day. Tony and I patched things up and were friends again.

Charlie and I just kept chatting via text, nothing serious. Hunter, remember him? The uber hot guy who cooked for me?Well... we were still talking! I was kind of in a funk one Friday when he asked if I wanted to go visit him. I agreed. He told me he didn't have his car, it was with a mechanic. He asked me to take a cab, he was going to refund me when I got to his place. I knew, I was guaranteed a great time when I got there, so I took the bus.... two.. and a cab. The cab took, roughly, forever before it got there and I was so close to Hunter's place. I couldn't walk, it wasn't that close. The cab companies told me that it was the weekend, everybody wanted to make money, nobody wanted to drop someone off, two miles away. They made a good point, but what was I to do? Eventually, two taxis were on their way to pick me up. I took the first one that arrived. I was lucky, there was a Taco Bell at that bus stop, they let me wait there and charge their phone without having bought anything. 

By the time I arrived at Hunter's, I was not in the mood at all. I just wanted to vent about the horrendous, three hour trip to his place. He wasn't having it! It must have been the full moon or something because Hunter wasn't in the mood either. When I got there, he paid the driver, gave me a hug, I started talking about how long it took me to get there, he told me he didn't want to hear about it. I was there now, and that was all that mattered. That caught me so off guard! We went into the house, sat on the sofa, he was watching a movie, he's always watching a movie! We had a lousy conversation, about Lord knows what, I didn't care, he said something rude, I didn't care, I told him I was going to bed. I walked away. 

As soon as I got into bed, Hunter jumped into the bed, held both my hands together with one hand behind my back, it hurt because that's not normally what I do with my hands; he whispered in my ear. Don't ever walk away from me again! Whoa! WTF?!?!?

Friday, April 24, 2015

Miss Plus America

Tortoise and I hung out one day.
Yours truly at Tort's. His art in the background. He's a very talented artist

We spent some time at my place, then he took us to his where I sat on the computer while he played the blues on the guitar. I looked for fun jobs online, there was a post about Miss plus size America. Of course I applied! They got back to me telling me they already had enough girls but were still looking for organisers. They wanted people to get them sponsors etc. Those people would get paid in commission if at all. I can't even remember because I rolled my eyes at that. I just wonder if they were looking for girls at all or used that to lure people and then attempt to use them to find them sponsors. Sorry, not interested. To me, they just seem like the people who post an ad looking for a personal shopper, they are going to send you a giant check that you must cash, use some of the money to shop and then send the rest back to an address that they send you. Of course, there would be a problem with the check because it's fake, you would be out a wad of money when the bank gets back to you about the fake check you just cashed. Basically, you've just been robbed! Before we left, Tortoise gave me an old business card with a handwritten phone number on the back. He told me to call that guy, he's single and plays drums. I asked why he wouldn't get the guy to call me instead of making me some thirsty ass girl, calling random drummers. I love me some musicians though but you know what I mean.

The 50 cent shoes I got at Ross  when out with Tortoise
Tort took me to dinner at some casino not too far from his place. He lives in the suburbs so there aren't that many casinos there but it's Vegas, so there are bound to be some close by.

We walked all the way to the restaurant. As we got there, I realised that I didn't have my cellphone with me and flipped! I could have dropped it anywhere. I hoped that it was in Tort's car. I asked him to give me his car keys so I could go check in the car. He told me if it's in the car, it was still gonna be there after dinner, let's eat first! I was like, I couldn't, I was going to look for it all the way back to the car, I might as well look for it in the car as well when I got there if I wasn't going to find it on the way. He kept coming up with excuses as to why it wasn't such a big deal, if it was in the car, I was going to find it after dinner. Eventually, he gave me the car key, looked at me hesitantly, and said, ok, I'll come with you! I had a feeling, he thought I was going to steal his car; drive it to Africa, maybe?

He came along, we found the phone on the floor of the car, went back to the restaurant and had Mexican.

Taco, Hot Tamele and other things I can't remember the names of

The food was delicious. After dinner, Tort took me home. It's always a nice time hanging with him. 

When I got home, I wondered if I should call the guy but decided against it. I mean, what do you say? Hi, can I please be your girlfriend? Would you like to be my boyfriend? Do you date black girls? What do you say?


AT  the BBW Club, the guy I told you about here came by. He shook Tony's hand, said hi, shook mine, asked how we were doing and that was it. THAT WAS IT! I was so relieved! We spent the rest of the night, having fun, dancing. I danced with some girls, who, I found out later on are in uhm, the adult entertainment business? Is that how you say porn stars nowadays? Fun all around. I had never been among so many plus sized women. I must tell you, it felt nice! I felt skinny. For the first time in a very long time, I felt like I knew what it is to be a spinner. We left after a number of hours. Tony dropped me home and went on her merry way. We planned to hang out again. 

Side note: I'm playing music randomly on my iTunes as I type this and Tortoise's song just came on. I must tell you, it's one of my favorite songs. I wish I could let you hear it. I will see if I can put it up on YouTube and post a link here. I also have Speedy's band's music but the quality of the recording isn't that great, so, we'll see. 

I was on my way job hunting along The Strip

It's fun to have fun for a living but every now and again, it's good to find a real-ish job to top up your savings, feel me? 

Same Day as above. These sunglasses have since broke. I miss them

I had a list of places that had advertised jobs online. I sent emails, texts, went in person to fill out applications, that was on the way there in the above pictures. and below.... 

Celine Still had her residency there. I believe she is no longer there.

My last stop was at Ceasars Palace.

Outside Ceasar's Palace

I went in,didn't get a vibe I was going to get the job but completed the application regardless. I was already there after all. 

I love the fake sky in some of the Casinos. I've seen it at The Venitian and Ceasar's where I took a couple of pictures...

They have Gordon Ramsay's Restaurant in there. Remember Daniel? The Italian who took me to a really nice restaurant in Hollywood for our first date? Gordon Ramsay's restaurant. Seeing Gordon's restaurant at Ceasar's reminded me of that time. It's not the same restaurant though, he has all kinds of restaurants.

PCD's store at Ceasar's.

Vegas is a really exciting place. If you haven't been there, do yourself a favor and check it out. Hell, go to the BBW Club, just don't make out with two guys the same night. Or do!

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Bringing a Gun To a Knife Fight

Charlie texted me with an update about his ex girlfriend. Apparently, the date didn't happen. He told me that he thought about everything I said and decided not to go out with her. During the same conversation, he told me that they set up a date at some karaoke bar, she was an hour late, he could no longer wait, so he left and blocked her. Apparently, he was having transportation problems, that's why she was running late, I don't know why he couldn't wait. Clearly, he wanted to give the relationship a second chance. He asked to take me out on his off day. I told him I would have to think about it.

We kept texting back and forth, one thing about him, he always responded to emails and texts unlike some guys I've, sadly, got to know. He told me that his roommate was in the process of moving out, when he has moved out, maybe we should hang out at his place and watch a movie or something. He had just bought himself this ginormous TV. I told him I was open to that but he wasn't going to lock me up in his apartment with old movies on our first number or dates. He needs to take me out like a normal person. He told me he has lots of food in his house, all kinds of food. If I knew how to cook, I should go make us a meal at his house. I was like, yeah, sorry, not really the cooking type. I mean, am I married? Who am  I cooking for? Why am I cooking for them? I didn't have a stove at my place, just a refrigerator and a microwave. I missed cooked food but I wasn't desperate.

We talked for weeks and weeks, he just didn't have time to meet up. One afternoon, I was at the laundromat, we texted, I asked if he was home. He was. I told him to come hang with me. We were really getting along, we talked all the time. He showed up on his bike in a very orange outfit, orange shorts, orange t-shirt and neon orange sneakers. I loved the sneakers though. Not sure about the rest of the outfit. Good thing it wasn't mine! Did I mention he brought a gun? Talk about bringing a gun to a knife fight, only there were no knives, nor a fight. He also brought me $10 in Quarters (20 cent coins) for the machines in the laundromat. That was sweet! Still not sure about the gun and the orange outfit. I asked about the gun, he told me that he never gets to carry it, so any chance he can, he takes it with him. Go figure. #FashionStatement
Cute, right?

We hung out at the laundry and talked about all kinds of things. He told me that his roommate was still at his place, he was still looking for an apartment to move to. I don't know how hard the roommate was looking for an apartment. I also asked Charlie if the roommate was the one renting from him or was it the other way round by any change. He assured me that the lease was on his name (Charlie's name). Charles was so desperate to know how old I was. I told him I was older than him, and that's all he needed to know. I was on Facebook, he asked to see something, I showed him. Next thing I know, he's red in the face. What happened? He scrolled up, looked at my personal details, saw my age and freaked out. Well, that's what you get, kind Sir! You think you are going to look for something and not find it? Haven't you read the Bible? Seek and ye shall find, boo boo! He told me he didn't know how he felt about the age difference because his mom told him that a woman should only be so much older, anything over and above that, the relationship will never work out. It was good to know that his mom had a minute or two to teach him some life lessons. More on the mom later!

When we were done with laundry, Charlie wanted to come chill at my place. I took the bus with my giant bags full of laundry, he rode the bike to my place. We sat and talked and listened to music. He was meant to leave late that night but both of us passed out on the bed. Gun and all!

The following morning, he took me out for breakfast. It was nice to have him around, I must say. he has a really nice vibe about him. He left after breakfast.
Chicken Tenders, my latest favorite thing!

My milkshake brings all the boys in the yard and they're like...

 He was working that night. When he got to his house, he took a nap. Upon waking up, he sent me text talking about his roommate said I'm too old, it will never work out between him and I. I will control him, and blah blah blah. Oh Lord, I was like, talk to me about all this in person. I'm not having a text conversation about this. I don't even know if it's you I'm talking to or the roommate.

On his way to work, he came by, brought me a bunch of roses. It was really cool, thinking that he rode his bike in Uniform and had a vase with water and a dozen red roses in there for me. I don't know how he managed to carry all that, but I was impressed and gladly accepted the roses. We hung out for an hour before he left for work. He had to pass my work on his way to work, I lived halfway in between.

We kept chatting during the week, without seeing each other.
I stopped to smell the roses in my red Ralph Lauren PJ's

I made friends with a lady whom I met online on a friendship site. We whatsapped for a while back and forth and seemed to have a lot in common. I was excited to make new friendships. We'll call her Tony. Tony suggested we go to a BBW Club off the strip (Big Beautiful Women). I agreed. You know me, I'm down for whatever. Plus, I'd always wanted to go to a BBW Club. She suggested we met at the club, late at night. I wasn't sure about meeting someone for the last time in the middle of the night. What if they were not who they said they were? I was like, how about we meet somewhere in the daytime first, and then go to the club a different night or so? She was cool. We met for drinks at a mall halfway between us. I hadn't been at that mall yet, I like going to new places. I took the bus there, it was nice and hot, I use the word nice loosely, this is Vegas we're talking about; the desert, hot means scorching hot.
Getting ready to meet up with Tony, Comfy Nine West Heels and Jessica Simpson Bag
We literally arrived there at exactly the same time and we recognised each other as we crossed paths at the mall, she was driving, looking for parking, I was walking, looking for the restaurant.

The mall was pretty, Town Square, was the name of it. We ate from the Happy hour menu, Cheap is the only way to go! I had calamari, she had salad and I can't remember what else. We had such a nice time! Instant chemistry, over text, she had told me that she is shy and doesn't go out much.
Calamari. It was alright, nothing to write home about

When I met her, she was anything but shy, she was cool, funny, we laughed out loud. It was such a good time. I'm smiling just thinking about it. I was looking forward to our friendship. She is a teacher, so she is available weekends etc. I am available, all the time lol.

The night of the BBW event, she was going to pick me up, turned out the club was off my street. I lived off Sahara and Las Vegas Blvd aka The Strip, the club is on the other side of Sahara and The Strip. I could've walked if it weren't in the middle of the night. I had had a long day, and the heat will get ya! Apparently, I passed out and didn't even hear Tony's calls when she came to pick me up. I woke up after an hour or so of her calling and texting me from outside my place. I wish I had told her which one my door was so she could come knock there and maybe I would've woken up. I felt so bad when  I finally woke up and it was an hour later! I was sure she had left without me. I felt horrible! I called her and fortunately, she was still outside. She had a couple off calls she needed to make, so she decided to park outside my place and take care of those while there,and luckily, I called while she was still there, on the phone.I quickly freshened up. I asked her to come in while I did. I didn't want her waiting for me much longer. You know how slow time moves when you're waiting for someone? It's better if you can see that they are actually getting ready.

I got ready in no time, and we left for the club. Goooooo! We were there in no time. Tony had told me she had been at that club before, she made out with the DJ the first time she went there, I believe, then she went again and the DJ and the friend he went with ended up in a fight over her. I was like, look at you! Men fighting over you! As we arrived, I found out that the story about the guys who fought over her didn't end there. They both wanted to go home with her, that's what the fight was about! Long story short, one of the guys, I think the one she made out with, ended up stalking her. He sent her texts about how he wished her dead. She told me she was glad she wasn't alone that night, the night we were there together. I secretly wished she hadn't told me that, because now, what happens if the guy was there that night? Then what? Am I safe? She told me she feared for the safety of her car because the guy knew her car. Oh Lord! Just as we were about to walk in, she told me this! Now, I'm freaking the freak out! We walked in, they had a 50% off special on entry fee. My kinda gig!

We got in, found us a nice spot to sit at, ordered drinks, and chilled for a second and ..... Tony was like, oh my gosh, here's the guy I told you about? UHM, THE ONE WHO WISHED YOU DEAD? Yes......

The guy came towards us......