Georgian Funeral

... I finally made it to Akhaltsikhe! Just as they police officers were heading for the funeral. Had the circumstances been different, It would've been much nicer to see everybody! I quickly changed into my black clothes and got a lift to the house!

Everybody gathered outside the house dressed in black. It was tough! Having recently lost a very special person in my life, it was a great challenge to be attending a funeral. Gayani wasn't just my assistant, she was my friend, she was a very special lady. She was very talented, she did embroidery, drew, painted, was a qualified doctor and worked at a special police department, she was gorgeous, and she was my top student!
We walked around the coffin and viewed the body. Her mother and her husband stood next to the coffin crying the entire time. That was hard for me to watch. From the house, we all walked to her old school, her open coffin was carried around to all these venues. It was sooooo sad :( From the school, we went to the police station, then to the grave yard (cemetery) she she was put to rest.

From here, we got a lift to the hotel where the family had made reservations for everybody to have lunch. The atmosphere was much lighter, we even took some pictures. One of my police officers has a crush on my colleague and an old homie from Akhaltsikhe, Harriet, he wanted me to take a pic and show her:-

Because, I was unprepared for the cold, as usual, one of my police friends gave me that jacket! It's a pefect fit! I tried to refuse it because she literally took it off her back and gave it to me, but she told me she loves me and I should have it. I have worn it every single day ever since! cos it's perfect, I just layer and later underneath and cover up with it!

This is the same restaurant my German friend was staying in. We almost ate here but it was too big for just the two of us. It felt weird to be back. We stuffed ourselves silly (not with the German guy, but with the funeral people!).  The food just wouldn't stop coming! I was ready for it because I don't eat when I travel so it was my first meal for the day. From the Funeral, I asked one of the officers to take me to my ex-host mom's house to say hi! The whole family was home! It was so nice to see her and the kids, the rest, not so much!
Back to the hotel, then  TO A RESTAURANT! Seriously! To eat and drink again! I used this time to catch up with my friends. Toasts were made! I was toasted for being a nice person for going all the way there to the funeral, they didn't think I'd make the trip! Well, we're friends, those people have been nothing but kind to me and they continue to show me kindness. Constantly!

Thanks for the Jacket, Eliso

True Love

Good times were had at the Restaurant, fire in the fire place! I went home with Tiko. Did I mention it was freezing out? Fortunately, they had the wood stove on in the lounge and a small one in the bedroom where I slept. I was still as sick as a dog! The next morning, Tiko's mom gave be a bag full of apples because I'd forgotten mine from the ex host mom in a police car. Okay then! Now I have 2 bags of apples and 2 bags of my own. I met up with Martyna for a few minutes before I took a marshrutka to Tbilisi.

Good bye Akhaltsikhe, I will be seeing you again SOON!
xoxo

Fucky! Fucky!

On Sunday, 30 October, I got ill. The dang cold was back! I stayed in and nursed myself. A couch surfer dude that lives in my town and I had been in touch via emails and sms-es. We finally met up on Sunday.
As usual, it took me forever to find the place!
We went to a Turkish restaurant along the beach. As soon as we got there, he got on the phone with his girlfriend. They sounded like they were arguing. He spoke Turkish. When he got off the call, he asked to take a picture with me and send it to his girlfriend to prove to him that nothing was going on between the two of us. Of course I refused, that was a preposterous request! How's seeing a picture of me going to prove that we're not together?

We had dinner, a meatball bun and lemonade.My nose got blocked and I couldn't even talk anymore, he suggested we call it a night and walked me halfway home. I skipped school for a week because I kept getting more and more sick. I got a text that one of my Assistants from the time I taught English to the police officers in Akhaltsikhe had passed away. She had a complicated pregnancy, they had to do an emergency caesarian. two months and 4 operations later, she passed away :( I tried to hitch hike to Akhaltsikhe. I only found out about the funeral the day before at midday. I got a lift to Kobuleti, a truck to Kutaisi, that took forever to get there! It was dark outside, and I knew it would've been risky hitch hiking all the way that night, so I called a friend and asked to stay the night at hers.

We had a fun time, freezing our hinds off, me trying not to die of the cold, and talking about men until I fell asleep. I remember trying to find the bathroom the next morning in the dark, without walking in on someone in their bedroom! That was fun! NOT. My friend walked me to the marshrutka around 7am. They dropped me off just outside town, where I hitch hiked from. I got a lift for like five minutes. Then it got tricky!. Nobody was stopping! It was freezing cold! I could see the snow on the mountain tops around me, I was dying when a red right hand drive, truck stopped for me. (FYI, it's "safe" to hike in Georgia.  I wouldn't do this back home in South Africa). That thing was high! It took me forever to get in! Struggling with the stairs. We did the introductions in Georgia, and that was the end of the conversation because he didn't speak English and I don't speak Georgian.

All of a sudden, dude decided to drive off the freeway, into a dodgy gravel road where there was a construction site and nothing else. I was like, Sorry, where I we going? In broken Georgian. He said nothing, and just kept driving. I told him the freeway was that way, and that's where I was going? He pointed at himself and I and said, "Fucky! Fucky". Which I suppose meant, him and I were going to to THAT! I said "GACHERET!" (stop!) He kept driving! I started yelling profanities that rhyme with truck! And the likes. I opened the door and was ready to fly out. He grabbed me by my clothes and pulled me back and said "Puli! Puli! ginda? (do you want money). F#&k you @$$ h0!3 I don't want your money! 34#%$^$^$&%&~! This went on for about a minute! One long S minute, if you ask me! He stopped, I ran off to the free way. My heart was beating fast! I was pissed off. I was stranded in the middle of nowhere and I felt unsafe, for the first time in this country. I felt like I was in his mercy because he could come back and run me over or something. He made a u-turn, as I saw him approach, I picked up rocks and threw them at his truck swearing him! I was soooo pissed off! All I wanted was to get to the funeral in time and not fucky fucky with a GEorgian Truck driver in his truck!

Meeting Mr. Hot

Saturday, 29 October

  Michelle came over to Batumi. We went to Khopa, the big bazaar. Window shopping, we ate some type of a puri (bread( with meat. Two type, one was worth mentioning, the other one, not so much. Back to the bazaar, PICTURES! with random strangers that just asked to take pics with us, with a huge, overweight mannequin,

and I asked a cute boy to pose for a pic with me. He had nice hair. Lord knows I love me a boy with nice long hair.

From there, we went searching for ice cream. It's winter time in Georgia and they don't sell ice cream in Winter because, well, it's cold! The shop keepers make that decision for the people - No ice cream for you, it's cold out! We went to Goodwill supermarket with the hope that we would find ice cream. I saw this nice guy, tall, slim, dressed really nicely, just like I like them! I was like, Oh my word, Michelle, I think, he's hot! I just need to see his face. She said, nah, the face is *thumbs down, but we can follow him, and check it out again. We started running after dude to the other end of the supermarket. I went, he's not so handsome, but I think he's hot! He's different, I feel like he has lots of stories to tell and I should hear them.

Me: Hi!
Him: Hi
ME: How are you? (to see if he speaks Georgian)
Him: I'm fine thanks, and you?
Score!
Me: Are you Georgian?

Him: Yes. But people think I am either Russian or English.
Fail
Me: You look good, would you like to ask me what my name is?

Him: Where are you from?
Me: South Africa
Him: Wow! That's one of the places I'd like to visit the most!
Score!
Me (getting all Georgian on him): Are you married?

Him: No, of course.
Michelle: Brook! I think you're scaring him! I think you're scaring him!
Me: You should marry me, I'll take you to South Africa with me.
Him: UUuuhhmmmm....... Ladies, would you like to order something? I can translate for you.
Me: Michelle, would you like something?
Mich: Nah
Me: It doesn't look lie my friend wants anything, I guess you won't be marrying me, bye!

On our way somewhere in a hidden corner, Michelle was like, I think you scared him when you proposed! I said well Georgians do it to us all the time, he's Georgian, this should've been normal for him. "I guess you're right!" said Michelle. We didn't find anything cheap enough to buy, so we left. On our way to the exit, Michelle went, "OMG there he is, let's keep going!" I said, he should be so lucky, I'm going to harass him! He turned around, and I said, "See? I'm following you!". He said, "Can you please help me choose a chocolate? I can't make up my mind". SCORE! WE took the project very seriously, Michelle and I. He asked where I was staying, I told him here in Batumi, it turned out he was staying at the hotel here, and was heading back to Tbilisi the next day. Great! NOT. He asked for my number, realised that his cell was off, asked me to take his and call him. I told him first of all I don't take guy's numbers, secondly, I don't call guys, they call me. This coming from someone who proposed to a guy five seconds into meeting him.
We agreed upon me taking his number, texting him mine, and him giving me a call later.

We got on our way around the city, (Mich and I).

We went to Vinyl, a cafe in the centre of Batumi.

WE ordered ice cream or milk shake. They didn't have it because it's Winter. She settled for iced coffee. I texted Mr Hot, he called back immediately. WE talked for 7 mins. Yup! I remember how long my calls are! He asked me to meet him at the hotel after 9pm. Michelle left around 6pm. It was freezing! I walked back home, did my reports, when Mr Hot called. His meeting was over and he wanted to know if I could still meet him. I agreed. An hour and a half later, 3 calls from him and about 7 songs later (that he sang for me over the phone while I was making my way to the hotel, some of which, I joined in and sang along), I arrived at the Radisson Blu. We hung out at the lounge, I told him in advance that I would not be going to his room.

I ordered H2O, it came in a nice glass bottle. Very fancy Radisson Blu! WE sat and talked and joked around, and flirted and talked about business, he told me stories about him, his life, his perfumes, his work, how many people he knows, where he has travelled to, how he is friends with the president (of Georgia! Not Jacob Zuma!), which perfume he wears when, when he started university, about his parents, him! him! him! If only I could take back the statement I made to Michelle earlier on when I said I wanted this guy to tell me his stories!

Then he asked me about Michelle, where she was from and was surprised she is Canadian seeing as she is Asian. Then he did the unthinkable! He said, "Asia has the most beautiful women in the world! The most attractive women in the world come from Asia!". I asked him if he liked my friend, he said, yes! I took my bag and told him I thought it was time for me to leave. He seemed to genuinely not understand what about that upset me. He went on to explain himself telling me he thought I was concerned as to whether or not he liked my friend, blah blah blah. And he wasn't telling me he is attracted to my friend but was just sharing the statistics. I was like do you not, at all think that your timing for stats was a bit off?
A few minutes later, he hailed me a cab, paid for it, and I left. We agreed to meet next time I'm in Tbilisi.

He called when I got home, thanked me for the evening, apologised for the misunderstanding and told me how much he appreciates me blah blah blah. He called the next day on his way back to Tbilisi, we talked for 40 minutes. It was nice-ish. He asked me about myself and my country. I wondered if he hadn't fallen and bumped his head, because that was out of character for him.

He called again the next day, when he arrived in Tbilisi and said to let him know when I am in the city, he would like to show me how he lives, introduce me to his friends etc

Couch Surfers part II

So my friend, Lo had two couch surfer dudes over for 'drinks'. One was from Turkey and the other from Poland. She and I had had plans to meet up, it so happened that she was with these dudes.
We automatically paired up, you know what it's like whene there are two guys and two girls? We weren't couples! At least, the Polish and I weren't (I've to speak for myself, right?).

We went for a walk around the city and bumped into T. Another volunteer. She joined us, she and I sandwiched the Polish inbetween us and took over his entire soul. He probably wanted to die, or scream out loud with excitement. We were slightly ooc (out of control). It was okay though because he threw some punches back our way as well. We sat at the square, near the "vulgar" water fountains as Lo called them because they have female statues with water sprinting out of the ladies boobies. After hanging out there for a bit, we walked further to find something to eat and ended up at, I think a Turkish restaurant by the Black sea. It was beautiful! I love the seaside at night, especially when there are ships/boats, the lights make it look so magical! The Turkish Delight (Turkish guy) "read" Lo's fortune from her Turkish coffee grinds. And T's. Polish and I were sceptic. We left for home around 11.

The next day, I got a call from Lo, she wanted to meet up at a cafe this time. I called T up, she was with another volunteer. The more the merrier, right? I met up with them where they were eating. We sat it out for a bit and then joined the gang, including the couch surfers at the other cafe. There were about 6 people over there! It was interesting. It's always fun having that many English speakers in one room! As in any big group of people, people talked to the ones closese to them. As the night progressed, T and I got deeper and deeper in conversation. I was enjoying out talks when everyone got up to leave. I decided to remain behind to finish our conversation. It turned out the surfers were staying behind as well. AWKWARD! Two girls and two guys! Then T and the Turkish paired up, then I was left to talk to the Polish, who at this point I had had enough off. I couldn't help but wish I'd left with the gang. I didn't even try to make small talk with Polish. It was pouring outside, really pouring, cats and dogs! the streets were flooded! I thought I'd take a cab with Polish and share the cost. His hostel wasn't far from my place.
 After some more awkwardness and third wheeling, We agreed to share a cab. I got dropped off first and couldn't have been more relieved to be out of that awkward situation.

The next day, T called to ask me for hotels in Tbilisi for Turkish Delight, enough said!

Sex Ginda?

Friday, 21st October.

My friend D, invited me over for the weekend. She's from Africa, I met her my first weekend away to Tbilisi when I still lived in Akhaltsikhe. We kept in touch via phone, but never met ever since.
I decided to hitch hike, because I had so much fun with it the first time I did. I took a bus to the hiking spot, just outside the city. I must have stood there for two minutes and I got a lift from a dude that was going to Rustavi. Past Tbilisi. I hit a jackpot! He spoke some English, was dressed really nicely, very stylish, he was a gentleman, he said nothing about sex or any such awkward conversation. He did call just about everybody he knew and told them that he picked up a zangi (Nigger) on the side of the road. He dropped me off outside D's house.

I had told my Georgian friend, B that I'd be in town. We agreed to meet up after his dance practice. My friend, D, had cooked for me: rice and fish cury. It was delicious! We never eat rice at the house and the fish was so delicious, and the fact that I was famished, because I don't eat when I travel, due to motion sickness. It's a 5hr drive from Batumi to Tbilisi. We had dinner and chilled, talked about Georgia, Georgians and life in General. D has lived in the country for 3years, her friend A, who was with her at hers when I arrived, 2. Their experience is different from what I'd expect from life in Georgia. I didn't want to jump to conclusions, I'd only just got there.

Around 6, B was done with dance, I took the metro to meet up with him. It was so nice to see him! It always is. He took me to the mountain, Tatsminda, where I have always wanted to go. It was freezing out. I think that's why we were the only ones there that night. We spent a little over an hour there, taking pictures, talking and being goofy. Did I mention it was freezing? From the mountan, he took me back to the Metro. He somehow left with my blackberry. Luckily, I remembered it before I boarded the metro, I ran back out, tried to find him. Good luck trying to find a Georgian among other Georgians, especially in winter, where all the guys are wearing blue jeans, and black leather jackets. The ladies, are in all black! I saw a dude approach me, asking if he can help me ( At least, I thought that's what  he was saying, because that's what I wanted him to say?). I told him I needed to use a phone. I was walking towards a puclic (pay) phone. He offered me his, thank goodness, I have memorised my cell number, it took me forever but I finally got it! Just after using this dude's cell. He said something along the lines of - Sex?! Seqsi , ginda? (do you want) Asi dolari (hundred dollars). I was like, "Heck no, freak!" I walked away, he followed me for a bit, "Modi, modi" (come here, come here!). I was like, thanks for your cell, bye!

Mr. Policeman who was sitting inside the station was looking at me as if wondering what was going on, but not concerned enough to ask. I just blurted out (when I figured he spoke English), Can you believe this guy? He's offering me $100 for sex. Mr Police said, " Only $100?" I rest my case!

I got home around 11pm, after a long misunderstanding with my friend, B, whom I told to go to the wrong station, blah blah blah.

Not much happened the next day, I had planned to go to Gori, to see the Stalin museum. I went as far as Didube Station, where I was to take the train or marshrutka to Gori. I changed my mind because my friend, D, had planned to go to choir practice with me. I decided to compromise and stay, so I headed back.
Practice was from 3-4. We left the house at 3:30. We were the first ones to arrive a few minutes after 3:30. The rest of the choir arrived after 4, 5 and 6.We stayed there until 7. Call it African time! There were no Georgians there! It was different being in the company of only black Africans in Georgia! We were about 15 in there. Unfortunately I didn't know any of the song they sang, the ones I kinda knew, were sang totaly differently.

The day was over, D and I talked about life and boys and friends and it was time for bed, the next morning, I headed back to Batumi. I hitch hicked back, just for the heck of it! I got a lift to Khashuri and had to hitch from there to Batumi. I'd never been to Khashuri before, the streets are narrow and people can stare over there! They yelled at me "Zango! Zango!( nigger) And to top it off, I needed to use the loo. I asked a random lady, who took me to a house nearby. The toilet was level ground with a small, round hole, same size as a cup in circumference. It was interesting, I had to politely decline. She took me to another one, which so happened to be her house as well. The hole was a tad bit bigger, I just had to use it! I had to walk for a km or so to an open spot to hike, where I soon got a lift to about 1hr away from Batumi, then I got a lift from a marshrutka (taxi) to Batumi. It was very nice of the driver to offer me a free lift!

I got home around 6/7, not so bad. I knew I wanted to hitch hike again, next time, I needed to go somewhere, but that story didn't have a happy ending...

Why is there a hearse outside our school?

In class with my co-teacher, I saw a commotion outside, moved closer to the window and saw a hearse. Flowers were all around it. There were men, picking the flowers up and putting them on the hearse. I asked my co-teacher, 'why is there a hearse outside our school?'. "And uhm, because uhm, this is a dead person!". 'Did those floweres fall of the hearse?'. "And uhm, flowers? Ah! Flowers! Kho! (Yes in Georgian). Flowers are from Europe".
'Did the flowers fall off the car?'. "And uhm, because uhm, the flowers, uhm, yes! Yes!-".
'Why are the flowers on the ground? Did they fall off the car'. By then, I was just trying to figure out if I can get her to understand my question. "And uhm, flowers, sorry, Brook, slowly please. I think so, I uhm, don't understand. Excuse me Brook".
'Do you know what flowers are?' "Yes! Flowers! Uhm, kho! Kho! These flowers are from Europe, Germany".
'What are those men doing' "oh, Brook, that's a dead person, and uhm, because the flowers".
'Look at this! I'm going to drop it. Do you see? It just fell off from the table. Do you understand what fall means?'.
"Yes! Yes! And uhm, the flowers - ". 'Wait! So this fell off the table. Did the flowers fall off from the top of the car? Why are they on the ground?'.
"I'm sorry Brook. Uhm, I don't understand". 'Which part of the question do you not understand? (I proceeded to write my question on the board. They usually understand written English better than spoken)'. "Aaahhhh, yes! Yes! Uhm, because this is a business. This business is for dead people".
The bell rang and it was time to go home. That was a 15minute Q & A between my English co-teacher and I.