Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Homeless in America

Living room and Bedroom in the background 

July 2012
I had only been in the US for two weeks; living in T’s apartment with her roommate. N worked till late and she left the house early because of the long commute to work. I would either still be in bed when she left or still around the apartment getting ready. She didn’t know what I did during the day because she was never there. Except of course when she was day off, in which case, she always a house guest, usually a guy she met online, that she was going to “hang out” with.
It was a one bedroom apartment. N lived in the bedroom, T had half of the living room. There was a big chest of drawers partitioning the living room and N’s bedroom but you could see everything that was going on in the living room. Whenever N had her online conquests over, it was always a bit of a challenge for me. She spent more time with them in the living room, just chilling, “hanging out” or watching a movie.When I was home, dying of heat, i would either be on my computer phone or reading a magazine.
Microwaved Chicken and salad. My daily lunch in Connecticut

Whenever N had free time, between hanging out with internet guys and working, she would be bashing T, which put me in a very uncomfortable position as T was my only friend around and she was helping me out with a lot. N would tell me how T is not to be trusted, she is a back stabber, a liar, a gossip, and she has a tendency to pretend like she’s having a serious conversation over the phone, meanwhile, it’s a conference call, and there’s someone else listening in; the list was endless. I couldn’t go back to T with this news. I didn’t know her that well either I wondered what N stood to gain from bashing her roommate and friend of  5 years to someone she had only known for, gees, I don’t know, a few days?
One morning said good bye and left for work. She wished me a good day as she always did, I wished her a good day too and she was out there door. A few minutes later, I got a call from T. She told me she had bad news. My heart sank. Something told me it had something to do with N because just after she bade me good bye, I heard her open the door. I had shivers, looked behind me, and she was still standing at the door staring at me in a very scary look that got me hospitalised if looks could kill. T told me that N had called her, T didn’t pick up. She said she had nothing to talk to N about. They had a very tricky relationship. N then left T a voicemail saying, (I can quote it because T forwarded me the voicemail and I still have it) “hello sisi, kunjani? Uuuuu—ngubani konje igama lale ntombazana? uBabalwa, andimfuni laphaya endlini. Ngicela umfunele enye indawo, angiyfuni leya ntombazana kuleya ndlu. Ok Bye” (translation: I don’t want Babalwa (ME) in that apartment. Please find her somewhere else to stay, I DON’T WANT HERE THERE!”
Wow! What am I going to do! I went through all kind of emotions at once! I felt bad that T had to go through this unnecessary drama because of me. I wasn’t sure why N was kicking me out. I hardly ever said anything to her, i hardly ever was in her space, I did my own thing and minded my own business AND listened to her when she wanted to talk about her internet guys and how sexy she is and how great she is in bed. What could it be? Most of all, what am i going to do? I couldn’t help thinking back on a few weeks prior when i was still in Johannesburg living with ZS. The drama I went through with P when she indirectly implied that she couldn’t live with me. The news really made me think. T told me not to worry, that was her apartment too and I was allowed to stay there until i was on my feet. That was good to hear but the apartment is in N’s name and that’s the person i lived with daily. I only got to see T once or twice a week. N didn’t say why, she just wanted me out. Again, WOW!
That's me outside T's work, i just walked 30 mins to get there with a bag of laundry on my shoulder and a handbag on another

Things sure were going to be awkward that night when N got home from work. I was thinking to myself, should I pretend I am sound asleep the entire time she was home? I called my family and friends back in South Africa and told them the latest. Everybody was shocked, alas, there was nothing they could do. I spend the entire day at the library as usual, desperately looking for specifically a live in job. For obvious reasons. I saw N the next morning before she left for work She greeted me like she usually did, I did the same. How you dzoing elephant in the room?