Sunday, December 23, 2012

Two Dates in Two Days

July 2012
My Interracial Site Profile Picture

My sister suggested I join an interracial dating site. I thought it was a fantastic idea and clicked away. The first man to contact me was an 82 year old man who lived in an assisted living facility (old age home). First a “flirt” then an email with his contact number. I emailed back. He had a long list of questions  for me; How long have you been in the country? Are you single? Would you like to stay in the country? Do you have a job?  Green card?  20 Questions anybody? I was like, the heck is up with this old man? Does he work for immigrations? FBI?  Also, it’s not like I had any intentions of dating a man that lived in a nursing home, nah thanks, I’m good.

No activity on the site for a while. Probably because I didn’t log on for a while, I was busy with more pressing issues. One day, I got an email from, let’s call him AR. Just a one-liner. I read his profile before responding. His header read: Text don’t call! I thought that was rather suspicious. He asked for my number, I gave it to him. WE talked for an hour. He seemed like an ok guy, he looked like what could have been a cross between Asian and Caucasian (white). He told me he was of Irish descent. He lived in Atlanta, Georgia and wanted me to move in with him. He made me write down a long list of places he was going to take me to like The Martin Luther King Museum, Disneyland and the Coca cola Museum.  His brother’s an Award Winning Broadway Actor who lives in Manhattan. He said he would introduce me to his brother , maybe he could help me with the whole acting thing.
I spotted this on the way back from one of my dates. Check out the hips!
I was overwhelmed. I don’t like it when people, especially who I haven’t even met, promise me the world. SSSllloowww Downnnn! He was on his way to New York, he told me if he knew a beautiful woman like me would give him the time of day, he would have gone via Connecticut and meet up with me. Well, that ain’t gonna happen now, will it? His profile states that he’s separated; RED FLAG! To me, that’s code for happily married but want to mess around on the side. Anyway, he was on his way to his father’s birthday in the East Coast, he texted me a few pictures of himself with his family at the party. Which was nice of him. I remember telling T about that guy and her telling me he seems serious, he might just have me move in with me in Georgia, that way I wouldn’t have to worry about looking for a place today OR a job for that matter. She was more enthusiastic about the guy than I was. I guess it’s the whole glass half full/half empty theory.
I didn’t hear from AR for a good two to three weeks when he texted me out of the blue. By the way, I did try to call him in the three  weeks of silence, he didn’t pick up, but texted me, hey what’s up? Which is another red flag, why couldn’t you pick up when I called Mr I’m Separated? Of course I didn’t say anything to him. This time, he texted me about how he was going to be in New York for the weekend. He wanted to take me out to dinner. I accepted but then raised the issue of transportation. How would I get back to Connecticut that late at night? He told me he had booked a nice hotel in the city, I could share the room with him. I told him I would’ve felt much more comfortable heading back to CT (Connecticut). I proposed lunch instead. He tried to entice me, telling me how fancy the hotel was and I would’ve really enjoyed it plus he thought I liked him. I told him it was not personal, but I would have felt much safer meeting a man from the internet in person in public and day light.  No response. That’s the last I heard from him. I guess I can forget about sightseeing in ATL.

Moving right along! I signed up on more dating sites. I got an email from a guy who lived 20 minutes or so from me, from one of the sites. It so happened that I didn’t even have a picture up on that site. Guy, who we shall call OC asked for my number. I obliged. He texted me, we played the texting game for a few days, I went over to T’s that Thursday, I remember he sent me pictures of his chest, which wasn’t much to write home about, but ok!  Of course I didn’t return the favour. I happen to know that MY chest IS much to write home about, ok? :P

I was hoping he wouldn’t send [pictures of his down-thereness. he didn’t. Yet. He wanted to see me the next day, which was Friday. Good because T was going to drop me home that day. He told me  bit about himself, he had an 11 year old son whom he lived with, he was divorced, a Football coach at a school and worked at Stop And Shop (pronounced Stap and shap for all my South African Friends. Trust me, if you say it any other way, the Americans don’t understand what in the world you’re talking about).  His work was in my neighbourhood, kinda.

T and I did our routine stuff Friday morning, we had lunch at the Chinese Buffet place, I know, I know, even though I was going on a date thereafter? Well, just as well! You’ll soon find out! He was to pick me up at the Shoprite Parking lot (yep, Shoprite is an international brand). He got there while I was still at the restaurant, T had to rush me home. I still had to freshen up. We went to the apartment, I freshened up, lipsticked it up, heels and we were out the door. She was nice enough to drop me at Shoprite. I introduced the two of them. I remember T was like, he’s cute! I was like, I know, he did look off-ish in his pictures. It was a bit of a relief. I’m sure you know what I’m talking about, it was kinda like the blind date scenario. By the way I had to ask him to call me before we met. Otherwise, we never would have talked on the phone, he was happy to just text.

This is what OC's car looks like
I hopped on his car, it was hot, a Dodge Truck, automatic panty dropper, if you ask me! I had mentioned that I love the beach, so we headed over there. It was July, summer, hot! WE found a bench in the park where we sat and got to know each other more. No this is not euphemism for something else! Get your mind out of the gutter J. In all the dates I’ve been to, the guys always took me to eat or for drinks first or it would end there. Never had I been on a date where there was no breaking of bread so to speak. First time for everything, right? Right! We sat and talked until I was so thirsty. There as a live performance at the park, but it wasn’t that loud. I told him I was thirsty, I was ready to buy myself something to drink. WE went to a random store, there was no life in there, they sold everything from clothing to stationery and had a fridge by the front line. No, I am not talking about Walmart or Target or anything like that, this was random.  He got a coke, I grabbed a water (That’s me being American, A water!). 

We went walking along the beach, my idea. I love walking on the sand, it’s very soothing for the feet. I took off my heels, he carried them for me, we walked and talked some more. He told me about how his ex wife cheated on him, and his girlfriend and this person and the other. He seemed like a nice genuine guy who was looking for love. He told me about his son.  And how he fought for him, his mom, the works. Eventually, I told him I was ready for him to drop me off. I was talked out. No offence but there was just something off about the whole thing. Plus I was getting hungry. He took me to Shoprite parking where he dropped me off. He gave me a peck on the lips and drove off. I didn’t know how I felt about him. I went back to the apartment, took a shower, and chilled.

He sent me texts and told me how much he enjoyed out time together, meeting me, and how he missed me, and was tempted to come back and see me. We had a date scheduled for the next morning. I told him to rather wait until the next day. He picked me up bright and early and took me to a flea market not too far from where I lived. It started raining as we got out of the car. He had on what seemed like brand new sneakers, white socks, very short shorts with a hole or two and a greyish t-shirt, with tons of holes. He looked clean, he had even shaved but I am not sure about his get up! 
The Hat OC Bought me

WE ran under the shelter of the market and walked around. He has his favourite stalls, he bought a few Pirated DVD’s, a Superman school bag for his son and wanted to buy me Stripper Sandals. You know the very high high clear glassy platform sandals? Yup, those! I prayed they wouldn’t fit. Not that I have anything against them but I knew that if I let him buy them for me, I would have to wear them for him. They were more for him. Talk about a gift that keeps on giving! They didn’t fit! Yay! They didn’t have anything out of the ordinary at the market, it looked more like a giant Chinese Store. He really wanted to buy me something. I opted for nail polish. From how he was dressed, he didn’t look like he could afford to buy me anything. I would have rather he bought himself an outfit. Oh and he bought me a hat!
We ran back to the car. From there, he took me out for breakfast, thank gosh! It was a nice restaurant where he had  very interesting choice of meal: toast, bananas, caramel something and I don’t know what else. I had an omelette.
The Omelette, Those finely chopped thingies are Fries. Neat huh?
He had told me he wanted to spend all day with me, I was looking forward to it. I didn’t really have plans for the weekend or any other day for that matter. At breakfast, he wouldn’t stop looking at his cell phone! T had won a gift from some store and had asked me to collect it for her. The store was on our way back to the apartment, so I ask OC to take me there.
T's prize
From the store, he was like, what are you doing this afternoon.  I thought to myself, I should be asking you! He told me he was going to drop me off, he missed his son. He had to check on him. He would call me later, we could meet up if I was up for it. Uhm, what’s wrong with this picture. I said sure!
The Nail Polishes (is that a word?)
He dropped me off and tried to stuff his tongue down my throat. He got aroused in the process. I don’t know if he wanted us to do it right there in the car or what? What do I know! He left, I went upstairs to the apartment very confused. A couple of hours later, he texted. I miss you, you’re so attractive, blah blah blah. He later sent me pictures of his down-thereness. Great! The text got racier and racier. I couldn’t take it anymore, I told him I had to go. He had said he wanted to meet during the week after work, didn’t happen. I didn’t care. 

Cut to October, four months late. I was looking to buy a car. He knows a thing or six about cars and one of his friend’s dad owns  a chain car place. He had told me he would help should I need a car. I decided to take him up on his offer. I texted him. He was like who’s this? I’ve a feeling he was trying to spite me, but I didn’t care. I reminded him who I was. He said I know just the place but, you know what? I would never help you, you broke my heart. You used me. WHATTTTT? I used you? How? What are you talking about? He said, please don’t ever contact me again. I didn’t even respond to that, I was too tired, I went straight to bed. A few days later, he texted me, 'Brook I feel in love with you and you broke my heart, I still love you, please talk to me.' It was around 10 pm he asked what I was up to, I told him I was at work in New Jersey, tired and it was bedtime. He said he would text the next day. He texted me the next day around 10 pm again, hey what’s up? I ignored it and replied the next day. He did the same thing the next night around 11pm. I ignored him again.




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