Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Back to Ontario, bye China, bye Lake Elsinore!

While talking to My Mrs, she had warned me to never tell "the men from the internet" where I lived. She didn't want anything happening to her half white child. I was like, of course not! I don't have strangers come to my place either. What do you take me for? Granted? Get it? :)

The following day, she had to work in her office and had some errands to run, so I hung around the house with Kid,  playing Chinese/English learning games on the Tablet. I was talking to a guy named Dave. He lives in Ontario, across the street from where Mae buys her Donuts! Dave seemed like an ok guy, divorced, grown kids who no longer live with him, owns a house in Mexico, biker dude et al. He wanted to meet up asap. Especially seeing as we weren't that far from each other.

I also talked to Cindy, my sister's friend's sister who lives in Utah. I told her about the misery I was in. She gets it, she has had her share of interesting experiences in this country. I tried to get hold of Mae, to no avail! She never returned my calls. I was like, this is something! I'm officially screwed! There are no buses from Mrs' house nor anywhere close by. I wasn't willing to spend a ton of money on a cab just yet. My friend from Ontario called to check up on me, she also offered to pick me up. That, I wasn't comfortable with! She's a nice person, I didn't want her to go through all that trouble for me.

I had to make a plan. Fast!

Dave and I had plans to meet that Sunday, It would have been my off day. Don't ask me off from what? I wasn't working! My position had been changed. I myself no longer knew Martha from Arthur!Saturday morning, I was supposed to be looking after the kid while Mrs worked, she wouldn't leave the child's side! I greeted them that morning, she grabbed the kid and held her tight, as if I was going to steal her. I got confused. Everything was ok the night before! The child tried to come play with me, she wasn't allowed to. Can you say, Fun Police?

I didn't know what was going on but wasn't about to ask. I am no longer that person who will discuss things to try and clear the air, especially not in people's houses. If you are a host, it is your duty to ensure the atmosphere is livable for everyone. Mrs took kid for a drive, don't know where they went, didn't care. I was chatting with Dave via text. I thought, you know what, even though I am not a big fan of being a damsel in distress, I'm just gonna tell him what's up. He asked if I wanted to move our date to Saturday instead and have him move me back to Ontario.Brilliant idea! He was going to make that trip the following day, anyway, all he had to do was make it a day earlier. Plus it's not like I was hectically busy working that day. Clearly things had changed AGAIN. 

I packed my bags AGAIN, put on a cute outfit and a night gown over it just for the element of surprise. Mrs had made copies of my ID, I had taken a picture of hers too. Just to spite her mean s, I gave Dave "my" address. I told him to park in the driveway! I mean, in all fairness, where was he supposed to pick me up? I had baggage with me! I was moving house, AGAIN! Plus the Mrs wasn't talking to me, it's not like I was going to ask someone who wasn't talking to me to drop me off somewhere, even though I'm 100% sure she would have jumped at the opportunity. 

Mrs just got back when Dave arrived, she was shaking! I don't know what shakes mean in Chinese! She may have been nervous, scared, angry or just cold. Do I care? I took off my night gown, put on my boots and went to her office, I asked for the copy she made of my ID back. I wasn't gonna have some random person walk around with my ID! She handed it to me, I dragged my bags through the office, the kid asked if I was leaving, I said yes and bade her good bye, that part was said for me. Mrs was holding on to the child as if someone gives a darn about her and that child of hers. UGh, so annoying! Dave had parked his huge Truck in the driveway. Loved it! He got out of the car, I walked towards him, gave him a hug and went "nice to meet you!" loud enough for the Mrs to hear. I wanted her to know that that was a stranger to me. That I had just done exactly what she told me not to and brought a stranger to her house. Whatever, what are you gonna do? Fire me? B*tch please!

She stood outside the entire time ave was putting my stuff in the truck. I had my sunglasses on, couldn't care less! 

Monday, October 21, 2013

One week in China

My new boss told me she was going to pick me up in a few days which she did. She brought the daughter along. Daughter was cute as can be! We went to the nearest supermarket and she bought a few groceries. The mother, not the three year old daughter :) She told me to pick a few things for myself because she didn't know what black people eat. I picked some fruits, veggies and chicken. She told me she was surprised that I picked only healthy foods seeing as I'm so fat. She asked if I was trying to lose weight, which I just laughed off.

On the way to Lake Elsinore, where she lives, she was telling me how much she likes Mae, she has a beautiful house, however Mae's house is a tad bit smaller and older than hers. Hey, who cares? I don't! She went on and on about black people, whites and Chinese. Her baby's father, who she met at University is white. He was much younger than her, 12 years. (younger, not old :)). He was handsome, which explains why her biracial kid was so beautiful. (according to her). Her kid is precious, because she is biracial and I have to help her keep an eye on the kid. She doesn't want the kid getting kidnapped blah blah blah. Apparently her kid looks more white than Chinese, which makes her that much more special. It was pathetic really. You don't love your child because she has white blood in her but because she is your child and it is your duty as a parent to love her. That's my two cents' worth. Plus that child looks 100% Chinese. Delusional much?

Her house is an hour or so away from Mae's. I left Mae crying, telling me to call her anytime and tell her if that B*tch (Mae's words) was mean to me. She would pick me up and take me back home. Her house was my home and I was welcome there anytime. That was a very nice thing for her to say. An hour or so later, we arrived at the bigger, newer, more beautiful house #SideLook
I mean it's newer and empty. Mae's house is fully furnished and warm. This lady's house still needed more furniture. It was cold in all senses of the word. She showed me to my room. I was excited to have my own room. There was a sleeper couch in there, which was narrower than I am tall, so lying down, my feet would hang. I guess she measured it on herself. We had a huge steel table in there, and a lamp stand. It was ok, I guess.

Part of the deal was that whenever she was available, I was to let Kid spend time with her and try not to interfere. She didn't want her child getting confused as to who her mother was. I was like, fine by me! My job was only to work two to three day per week anyway. The following morning, she asked me to tag along. We went to the Chinese market to get more groceries.  While talking, the night before, I mentioned that bread is my weakness. She bought tons of bread, cookies, anything pastry like for me! Nothing costing more than a dollar each. She told me later on that all that was mine because the food she likes is very costly and she wasn't going to offer me a room, pay mer and still let me eat her expensive food. Condescending Much?

She fed all the fruit she "bought for me" to her daughter. She didn't realise that her daughter liked fruit that much. Whatevz! The following afternoon, we had a talk. She confirmed how much she was going to pay me, which she had reduced by a hundred dollars already. I was like, that was not the amount you told me before! She looked me in the eye and was like, yes it was! Not it wasn't, call Mae and ask her, she was there when we discussed all this! She wouldn't call me. That left a bad taste in my mouth.Mae called that night for an update. I told her everything. She seemed shocked that that lady was already doing me like that.

Day three, The lady wanted to work, so she dropped Kid and I off at the park. It was nice to be outside and see other people. That area is cold! My room was literally the coldest in the entire house! I could feel the Air conditioning running in the entire house but nothing in my room. I'm not sure how she got that right.

I had sleepless nights, partly because of stress of what I was going to do next, disbelief that someone could do a person that way and still expect said person to take care of their precious child. Like, where's the logic in that. I wasn't crazy about moving back in with Mae, but I was considering it. I also didn't want to be that person who quit a job, you know? The lady showed up hours later to pick us up. Kid was having so much fun, bullying all the kids in the park.

When we got back to the house, Kid and I were attached to the hip. She's a really fun and intelligent child. Mother got jealous. We had another talk. She told me she likes me, I fit right in with her family. She also liked the fact that I like Chinese food, whatever! She had made Chinese for us for dinner since I had got there. It was delicious, I love Chinese. Plus, she made stuff I had never had before. Even better! She told me that she also liked that I was computer savvy, she wanted me to help her around the office. She was tired of working. She wanted me to teach her more about online dating, make her over, she knew if I did, it would take her no time to find a man because white men like Chinese women. They don't like blacks at all, I need to get over white men and start dating within my own race. As soon as she met her wealthy, white man, she was going to hand over her entire business to me and move to San Diego with her man. That's her dream place to live. B*tch, I've already lived in San Diego!

Anyway, she also told me that she thought she could manage with her daughter, she was already jealous how I was getting along with her daughter. She thought it would be a better idea if I would rather change my position from being a nanny to being her companion. She needed a friend more than she needed a nanny. She would then NOT pay me AT ALL and just let me live in her house free of charge and feed me. WHHHAAATTTT THE HELL! I looked her in the eye and literally froze! I couldn't believe my ears. WTF

In one week, my position had changed, my salary had changed, everything changed!

Sunday, October 13, 2013

I got the job!

When nothing came out of the job, I had practically been offered, I had to think again and think hard. I posted a few ads online Employment Wanted. I was still sending out my resume. It must have somewhat come out that I had posted an ad online, Mae asked me to post one for her too. All of a sudden, she was seriously looking for a job. She came out of retirement! She was right there at the library with me applying and stuff. Day after I posted her ad, she got a response and subsequently got the job! She's still in that job. Talk about a slap on the face! She works for three different branches of the company, she asked me numerous times to go with her and, I don't know, watch the grass grow while she works? I refused every single time!

She has a Nigerian friend who owns a Computer store. We would go visit often. Apparently he has always had a crush on her, but he's married, has been for 20 years, then it came out that he has a gorgeous house, then his wife is very lucky to be with him, I found out they had dated for a while four years ago, but nothing came of it because the wife's mother is Mae's ex neighbour. Then I found out that they were together for a very long time but Mae was over being with a married man, I was just like, you know what! Whenever we went over there, they always flirted and kissed in the mouth, then he would spank her butt. One afternoon, she told him my entire life story and asked him to hook me up with a good man. #EyeRoll

He has a friend who is a pasta. The friend, apparently loves black women, blah blah blah. They called him on the phone and made me give him my number, The friend talked for like ever on the phone, about himself and how is a good catch, he loves younger, black women and he knows how to please them in bed, he tried telling me how he makes his women squ*rt, I was like, er, yeah, I gotta go now, bye! While on the phone with Pastor Pervert, who by the way has a project in Africa, he goes there often and he was telling me about how poor people are in that part of the country, women be walking around braless, you can see their breasts through their thin, old and torn blouses. Far as I'm concerned, he is a freak who needs to get the heck out of my continent! I can only imagine how many women he has given orgasms in that village, seeing as he is so good in bed. Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! So while on the phone with him, Mae and Friend were going at it, make out session, he was caressing her breasts, she was moaning. I kid you not! This is a tiny, little office at the back of the store, I was right there with them. Just because I was on the phone doesn't mean I wanna watch you guys have s*x, I mean, really now! Who does that?

I walked out, they were like, get back here! WTF! No, I don't want to! What!!!!!

Pastor Perv called again one random morning, he talked about s*x again, I had to go, we never talked again. He had told me he wanted to meet me, I should go to LA and spend the weekend with him at his house. I was like, yeah, I'm good, thanks. If a guy wants to see a girl for the first time, he should go pick up the girl and take her somewhere private to spend time. He told me he was going to see when his friend would be available to pick his s up, dude doesn't even have a car? Who doesn't have a car in LA? Well, him, I guess. One random morning, I got a call from Mae's friend. If I didn't know better, I would say he flirted with me a little bit before telling me who he was. Can you say creepy? Of course, I didn't go there with him, I got no time to play, WHO AM I TALKING TO first! He then asked if he could bring Pastor over to the house that afternoon, he wanted us to get sometime alone, he would take Mae with him, blah blah blah. WTF is this? I didn't need that kind of time alone with that random, weird, pastor, I had never even met! I agreed, knowing that I wasn't gonna do anything I didn't want to do. He never brought him over! Go figure!

We never went back to the church Mae took me to my first day there. In fact, we never ever went to church again! Don't ask! Apparently, she used to have a crush on the pastor of THAT church growing up, but he went on to get married. She was currently dating a Pastor from a church who she met on blackpeoplemeet, a website where, you guessed! You meet black people! They are still together. They were already dating when she went on third base with the Nigerian PC Store guy. She went on a few dates with a few different guys. In her defense, she's not married, so... I enjoyed watching her get ready for dates, she dressed so beautifully! She has more than 50 bottles of different kinds of expensive perfumes! If you know me, I love me some perfume, but she got me beat on that one! She always brought food home from the dates haha, that was different! She would then eat it over the course of the week. Anyway, the food that we bought after church on my first day in Ontario, was put away and locked up in cupboards, seriously! She locked it up! So as has always been the case with all my living arrangements, starting from Georgia (Eastern Europe), besides Perry, I would go for "walks". That's when I would get myself something to eat and a few items to stash in my bag. It was harder living with so many people and sharing a room with someone. She bought herself donuts every morning, and would buy take out for lunch and dinner. She sometimes offered to buy me stuff but I couldn't.

By the way, two or three days after moving in, she told me how much I had to pay for rent which included meals. Which were locked up in cupboards.Story of my life, always pay for food I never get. Maybe they think just because I don't look hungry, I am not?

After about a month and a half in Ontario, I responded to an ad. They were looking for someone to take look after their 3 year old kid two or three times a week. They wanted a live in au pair. I was like, I think I can do this. The lady called to interview me over the phone. It went well, we got along like a house on fire! I was excited! She arranged to come see me in person. I told Mae about it. She was so happy for me. The lady came over, Mae was home, we all hung out like old friends, it was nice. The lady was Chines, well, still is Chinese haha. She told me she was going to think about it and get back to me.

Mae got a call that night while in the bedroom with me, she took it outside. She always took all her calls wherever she was, she is always on the phone! That particular one was different, I guess. She came back about thirty minutes later and told me that was the Chinese lady! She wanted to ask a few questions about me. She told me not to worry, she put in a good word. Uhm, then why did you take the call outside, I asked, in my head.

A few days later, the lady called, I got the job!

Saturday, October 12, 2013

The Interview

Days became weeks, which in turn became months in Ontario. I was job hunting but it's a very relaxed area with nothing much going on. If I was a drinker or a stoner, I'd probably always be on something in Ontario. I took a break from dating. Mae would drop me off at the library whenever she went that side. It would be a nice change of atmosphere. She always took me along whenever she went wherever though, so that was nice. And that was almost all the time.

I started getting emails and calls back from employers and agencies. They don't have wifi at  Mae's so I would either use my phone or the library. She asked me what I was doing at the library all that time, I would spend, literally the entire day there. Why not! I would also watch some tv shows over there and use the earphones that El almost killed me for buying! I told her what I was doing. She is retired. Next thing I knew, she was applying for jobs, left, right and centre. I was like, great. That automatically reduces my chances by 50%.

She offered to take me if I were ever to get called for an interview because there was totally no public transportation there The place is really for retired folks. I got called for my first interview! So nervous! I told her about it! She took me there, the lady was late getting to the office, so we hung out in the parking lot for a while. Mae was confident I was going to get the job. The lady finally arrived. She called me in, Mae was asked to come wait inside too, instead of in the car. She brought her stuff with her, I mean Certificates, resumes, you name it! She came prepared! She came and sat right next to me, in fact the moment we went in, she asked the lady if they needed someone to spruce up their office for them, because she is good in interior decor, then she offered to be a tea lady, then she took over the entire interview telling the lady about herself, her experience, and how SHE  would be the best person for the job. How do you compete with a 62 year old retired lady who is letting you stay in her house and with whom you are sharing a bed? It was awkward! I wanted to undo the whole thing and not be there! I couldn't believe what was happening before my very eyes!

Whenever I saw a gap, I would try and say something, she would agree and one up me. When we were done, the lady asked for my number, Mae gave the lady her number as well. Walking to the car, I was dumbfounded. I mean, I wasn't going to confront her but I was still shocked. What kind of person am I dealing with here? She went on and on about how that job is so mine (AGAIN!), She had a feeling they were going to call me, she just knew it! She told me not to worry about transportation, she would drive me to and fro. Yeah, ok, I'm totally looking forward to that #SideLook

I got a call that night. It was the big boss. The position was that of a caregiver. They were looking for someone who would take care of the big boss' mom. He gave me another interview over the phone. It was promising! He asked me to go to the house the following day to meet his mother. He was happy with me. I was ecstatic! I didn't know what to tell Mae. Which didn't matter because she followed me to the bedroom to listen in on the call and was busy talking to me, asking if it was about that job and telling me how to answer questions she couldn't even hear.

The following day, it was nice and cold. Mae and I got ready, we started off at the donut store, she has donuts and coffee every morning. She told every body in there that I got a job and she was right when she said I was going to get it. It seemed those people were clued up about my story. We got there just before the boss. It was a gorgeous mansion! I was so excited. Well, I google earthed it the night before already haha.  Don't judge me, I had been unemployed for a very long time! Mae was dressed to impress. She must have been up to something. She has very nice clothes too, LOTS! Anyway, the guy called me outside his car, we had ANOTHER interview. A weird little interview, where he was asking me if I dress the way I was dressed or not, blah blah blah. ugh, whatever, I could tell that he, for some reason was no longer interested. He told me his mom was asleep. He would call later to let me know if and when she would like to see me. Never happened! Not surprised! Mae was disappointed. If anyone can believe that.

Wednesday, October 09, 2013

Pay, B*tch!

We arrived in  Ontario two hours later. It was a nice drive there from LA. I had never been to that side before. I was looking forward to seeing it in daylight. All the grandkids weren't home when we got there. Turns out some of them live with their mom. Their father lives with his mom and some of the grandkids,four dogs (a few pit-bulls and a chihuahua) and a few cats. The house is huge and very clean, smells good too. Nothing compared to where I came from in LA. Mae took me to her bedroom, she told me to find a spot for my stuff. It was late, I didn't want to waste any more of her time putting my bags in her room if I was still going to have to move it to mine. Well, THAT WAS GOING TO BE MY ROOM TOO! I got confused, but didn't want to come across as rude and unappreciative. I thought we had talked about the living arrangement and I had asked her over and over if she had A room for me. A ROOM! Which I was willing to pay rent for. Turns out, nope, we were going to share a very beautiful, cosy bedroom, with ensuite, nice smelling bathroom. Same bed. It's a king, but still. It's different when you moved to a place under the impression you were going to have your own room. On the flip side, it takes a very nice person to let a stranded stranger who lives with freaks to move in with them and share a bed with them, that I don't take for granted.

After dropping my stuff, we walked the dog around the block, very suburbia! The dog's a very sweet pitbull, nothing like the scary one which stays outside. This one was a house dog, she and the Chihuahua were house dogs, then there was another pit bull with was a little bit of both. Very sweet dog! And I', not even a dog person. Nor a cat person! On our walk, Mae got a lot of calls from people who were asking her about me. She must have been very busy on the way to LA to have told just about everybody on her contact list about me!  The following morning, Sunday, I was sound asleep, first peaceful night's sleep I had had in months. Or since San Diego (Perry's - where I had my own room)! Mae woke me up and asked if I wanted to go to church. Uhm, not really! She guilt tripped me into agreeing, so I did. Service wasn't that long. From there, we went to the Gas station (petrol station), when we got there, she filled up the tank and then told me how much it was! Meaning, PAY BTCH! Good thing I had my wallet with me, cos that we had not talked about but I was learning. Remember how she insisted I didn't have to pay her back a dime? Well, that didn't last. I felt better paying, because then it meant I would have some rights; even if, only in my head. You know what I mean?

We then went to the supermarket.We bought a cart full of groceries, I was wondering if I was paying for that too but she did. With the money I had just given her for gas. Don't ask! Around 4 in the afternoon, I was about to pass out with hunger, I hadn't eaten since the previous morning or so because I spent the rest of the day plotting a way out. We bought $1 burgers for everybody, +-7 people. I couldn't wait till we got back to the house to gobble it down. The smell was killing me!

We went straight home from the burger place, thank goodness! Mae cooked dinner, everybody had a burger. I hung out around the kitchen with her. Still familiarising myself with everything. She is hilarious and very easy to talk to about anything. And she's absolutely gorgeous! She used to be a model. She's 62.

We had dinner almost as soon as it was ready, it was delish! Mae used to own a restaurant, so she's a great cook.

The following morning, I noticed the same thing I noticed when I put my bags by the bedside; that the edge of the bed by my side wasn't stable. I thought to mention it, so she knows before somebody thinks I broke a bed. She freaked out! She yelled and told me I broke her bed! I was dumbfounded! One thing about me, I suck at defending myself on the spot #DelayedReaction. I got so overwhelmed, I'm in a new home, with like, a thousand people, I am not sure what the deal is gonna be, especially now that I am sharing a bed with this person who starved me half to death my first day there, like, should I buy my own food? Is it gonna seem strange if I do? How will I pay for electricity if I use hers to cook for myself? Are we going to share a bed, Is her hot son single? Dude is H.O.T.T. hot! I kid you not! Six pack and all! And he's not afraid to walk around the house shirtless. Daaayyyuuummm! El who? Of course, I wasn't gonna go there! The last thing I needed was to complicate my life further than it already was. I was definitely not trying to date.

The bed didn't seem like it was broken, it seemed more like something had come undone or something. I wanted to have a look but Mae was like, do not touch my bed! blah blah blah! I was chocking up, I felt so helpless! She called Hot Son and told her about the broken bed. He was in the living room. He came in and was like, "I  told Phillip that he didn't fix this bed! It's still got the same problem it had before he fixed it!" MAaaaaaan, he shouldn't have said that! Tears went rolling down my cheeks. I knew I didn't break that fcking bed! Who tells a person that they broke a bed when they know that said person did not break the bed? I thought to myself, who is this woman? What is she trying to do? Is she trying to get me to buy her a new king size bed? Pity I sold my custom made one to a "friend" who still owes me for the stuff I sold her way back when I went to Georgia. Some friend! Anyway, Mae was like, I told Phillip blah blah blah, who cares what she even said! Just the thought of her admitting to Hot Son that the bed had been that way for a while and she even had someone try to fix it, made me puke in my mouth. It changed how I saw her. I'm sorry but She will forever be that person to me.That was very mean girls!

From then on, I really just wanted to sleep on the floor but didn't want to make a bad situation worse, you know?

Tuesday, October 01, 2013

Good Bye Los Angeles, hello Ontario!

As soon as El left for work, I was up, making phone calls, emailing people, doing whatever I had to to find a place to stay. Sister was out for the day, I had privacy, which was great. A friend of mine, that I never met called a friend of hers. She then called me back and told me the friend has a place for me. I could the friend, we'll call her Mae, she told me she lived two hours away, could pick me up and have me move in asap. I wanted to know if she actually had a room I could rent from her. I was so done with freebies! As we all know, there is no such thing as free lunch anyways. She told me she had room. I kept asking, "do you have a room?" She was like, yes, I have room! I wanted to negotiate rent and rules and all that before I even moved there, to see if it had potential of working out. She told me she didn't want my money, she just wanted me to be safe, she lived with her grandchildren, if I was ok with that, she didn't care about anything else. I was like, please think about charging me rent, I will me more comfortable that way. My thing is, once someone offers to do something for you free of charge, you end up being indebted to them for life. I don't like that feeling. It automatically puts you in a position of inferiority to that person. It's hard to come out of that place. Maybe it's my skew way of seeing things?

I asked her how much she was going to charge for picking me up, she told me not to patronise her. OK. I was willing to take the train, but it was getting dark, I had to pack, quickly before Sister got home. It  was going to be a while before El got home. I wasn't worried about him. Mae was on her way to pick me up in LA as soon as we hung up. I packed, well, I was living off my Walmart luggage set anyway. Remember the one El told me wasn't good enough for his girlfriend, therefore he was going to buy me a great set from Sears? Never happened. Then he told me he was going to use the money he owed me (remember trip to Universal Studios?) to buy me a set? Never happened? Never got the money back. Good thing I wrote it off as being mugged the moment she borrowed it from me.He had also told me he was going to buy a clothes rack for me, never happened. I lived off "a suitcase" the entire time I was there.

By the time Mae got there, I was done, and ready to hit the road, Jack! I couldn't be more grateful to this stranger for doing this for me when she didn't even know me. I packed my stuff in the trunk of her nice Chevrolet, ran back to the apartment, left his key and I was gone! G.O.N.E! Best feeling in the world! In fact, the feeling I had leaving that place was much, much better than when I moved in!

I got to meed Mae, she had a friend of hers in the car and her dog (Mae's dog). Everybody was lovely. I felt safe immediately. Thank goodness! It was a nice two hour drive back to Ontario from Los Angeles. This is not the Ontario in Canada, it's the one in California, near Riverside. As in the Riverside Killer. It's also not far from Big Bear, the resort the Forresters from The Bold and The Beautiful own a cabin at. Which is also where Christopher Donner, was captured and killed. You must have heard about him, the former soldier who lost it and killed ex boss or whatever? Anyway, it's beautiful there, mountains all around and snow on the mountain tops in Summer. It was a little cooler than LA but still warm enough. Very peaceful. Just what I needed at that point in time.