Drug Test | Being Fired?

 (continued from previous blog) That was close! Imagine if I had actually gotten fired? I thought to myself! It wasn't out of the realm of possibility. I had a feeling the ladies in the office hated me. They all did. That is out of the realm of possibility. Generally, people like me. I get along with people and never really show how I feel about someone in certain environments because, what's the point, really? So that it's awkward? And then what? 

I went out, happy to prove to the guard that I was right that WAS my truck! I wasn't stealing it! And I wasn't fired!  I did what I needed to do out there, came back without any issues at the gate with the guard. I went to my parking spot, by my trailer. I always reserve an empty trailer, that I keep lock while I'm on my off days cos you never know and looking for an empty trailer is no fun. They will have you go from company to company looking for company trailers. The companies don't want to part with the empties because where are they going to load when their customers place orders? Not fun! And for someone who gets paid per mile, you can end up being paid $0. They put one zip code that they sent you from and the one you went to. Which can be the same zip code (postal code). Thereby totaling 1 mile or zero miles. Hours of work for no pay. That sht heartless af, if you ask me! Some folks will get paid $50 to $100 or whatever random figure, per empty trailer. It just depends on who is doing the dispatching and who's doing the hunting. In my case, I was only working with the same three ladies who wished I were dead, so. 

I enjoyed my nights as I always do. Nothing beats shutting the blinds, turning on the heater, in the cold months, turning on the iPad to watch whatever, eat a warm meal and or drink my hot chocolate tea... naked in my truck! I woke up early the next morning and did my meal prepping for the week ahead. It was my last day off. I still didn't know where I was going next. That ticked me off a bit, cos, why should I check with you? It's your job to assign loads to drivers, not ours to fish. Eventually, I sent a message to the office. They in turn told me that they wanted to see me. My heart sank! I was in the middle of a chat with an old friend of mine on whatsapp. It was a nice, relaxed afternoon. I didn't feel like putting on a bra and regular clothes to go talk to a manager who hates me on my off day. I asked what it was about. They told me to come in right away. I wasn't going to get any loads until I saw her. I told them but I'm off today, why do I have to be made to feel like sht on my off day. That's when they told me, fine! You can go see her tomorrow. You won't get work until you see her. So, basically, I was forfeiting a whole day of work for this sht. I was like, fine, I'll come now. They said, no, please, don't! It's you off day! We wouldn't want you to have to do work stuff on your off day. Come tomorrow. Do you see the patronization? The thought of it, still makes me feel like, wow! These kinds of people really do exist in this world! Wow! To derive pleasure from this kind of stuff really boggles my mind. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. This is the second day in a row where I am being made to feel like, maybe, just maybe, I've been fired! 

The other time I felt like sht, apart from the entire time I worked this account, was when they told me to drop everything and go do a drug test. They didn't tell me what they wanted to see me in the office for. They just told me to log on and then go talk to the manager. I hate that sht! It gives me such anxiety. WHAT THE FCK IS IT ABOUT!!!!! Tell me! I went to the office and was told that they needed me to do a random drug test. They told me they aren't allowed to tell me beforehand, in case I jeopardize the test or whatever.  I drove ten minutes to Ontario, did the test. I had nothing to worry about because I don't do drugs. 

Few days later, I was told to report to the office. Again, they wouldn't tell me what the fck for. I was so over these people, with their shenanigans, heaven help me! I get to the office and the fcking manager wanted to tell me that they needed to do a drug test on me. BUT I JUST DID ONE! I know, the results came back zero. The urine was too clean. Of course it was clean, I had just drank a gallon of water. That's what I do every morning. Maybe if you had told me beforehand, I wouldn't have done that that morning. Their premise is not without flaws, if you ask me! This time, they weren't going to make me pee in a cup, they were going to cut my hair. Of course this btches want to cut my hair. They hate me! What's the worst thing you can do to another woman? Especially a woman of color whose hair doesn't go two inches per week? Chop off their hair! I got it!

I told you my story about losing my hair and my epic fail experience with Minoxidol. Well, now they want me to lose even more hair. This was just great! They took a bunch of my hair. The woman who was cutting my hair, even told me he was going to cut right at the top of my hair, to make sure it's not somewhere visible. Are you fucking kidding me? That's where you DON'T do it! She did it nonetheless. At this point, I was just  prisoner, with zero rights. Where was the toxic work environment movement then? Sht! They must've gotten their results cos I didn't hear from them again....

Just kidding! One day, I was on the freeway, driving from a customer to my parking place for the night. I got an urgent message from the three witches. They wanted me to make a u-turn (they have GPS on the truck, they knew exactly how far I was from the nearest drug place). They wanted me to go do another test.I was like, again? They said, you've been randomly picked. Haha! I literally am laughing out loud cos I think they were looking for reasons to fire me. Maybe because I had dreadlocks, they thought I dabble in marijuana and were hoping to catch me. The had the wrong girl! I am the most nun / mormon person, you can ever find, who is neither. They directed me to the center of Stockton. A big city, that's not meant for trucks. Of course I got stuck in there, trying to leave the no truck parking lot I had squeezed into. I blocked traffic for about 30 minutes trying to get out. I think they sent me there on purpose, probably hoping I would miss my appointment, while trying to find parking, so they can fire me for 'drug test refusal'. Passed that drug test as well! 

Back to the office story on my off day. I get dressed, tell my friend what's going on. She gets frustrated right along with me. I go tot he office. Manager tells me to leave and come back tomorrow. She wasn't going to deal with whatever she wanted to on my off day. Wow! I literally went: Can we please get this over and done with? My day off has already been ruined. You guys have been calling, texting and messaging me for hours about this. I am not going to relax until this has been taken care off. Yes, you're the boss, you have all the powers. You win! By telling me to go back to my truck after you've told me to come here, you're just flexing your muscles and proving a point. You don't have to. I get it. You've got the upper hand. She then tells me to wait outside, and come back in ten minutes. So, now, I'm waiting out there. My blood is boiling. Why is this happening to me? 

Eventually, I go in. She takes me to a conference room. I walk past the new lady who I half jokingly asked if I was fired the previous day. She still won't look at me. I still say hi to everyone. I go into the conference room. One of the managers get called, she was one of the barrage texters who told me that they wanted to see me about some training that every driver needs to do. They have her on speaker during the meeting. A Video gets played on a laptop. And another one. It's videos of the two incidents I told you about in the previous blog, where I was in traffic light situations that were unpreventable. After they were played, she semi looked at me. Her hands were shaking, she wasn't really making eye contact either. I can red a room. It was awkward. I started to explain, then as I did, she kept cutting me off. That's when it dawned on me. I'm getting fired! 

She told me that the company has zero tolerance of unsafe drivers, therefore, they were letting me go. Please leave the premises by 5pm. It was 3pm. I had 2 hours to move my entire life out of the truck into god knows what. I had two hours to find somewhere to stay that night and beyond. I had two hours to see if my car that had been parked forever will work. I had two hours to move my 3 meals that I had just cooked for 7 days. @ hours to digest the fact that I wasn't going to work the following day. I was fired yall! Again! There was no accident! Nobody was hit! No other parties were affected! There were no police involved. They won! 

I got up, pushed the chair back under the table, walked out the conference room. Shut the door behind me. Opened it up again, said thank you to my manager who had just fired me, said goodbye to everyone in the office, who obviously knew from the day before when prematurely removed me from the system that my ass was toast. I picked up the phone and called the friend I was chatting with. I told her I had just been fired. She was shocked. After that, I called my sister, and cried to her. It was the middle of the night. I am lucky that she picked up and am sorry that I didn't have good news to share with her, but am thankful that I had her there. AS I was talking to her, I started packing. Time was of the essence. Two hours!