His story was, I was supposed to be this woman who was once
in a relationship with him but had to move to the East Coast. For that reason,
we broke up. We had recently got back together. I was from some Part of
California, I’m forgetting the name of the city. It’s a city somewhere in
Central California, some place I had never heard of. I forgot it as soon as he
mentioned it. This story, by the way he told me at the parking lot of the
apartment where he lives. I mean, I’m good but not that good! Plus, again, what
was wrong with the truth? I had to lie about my age too and pretend to be older
than I am. Actually, now that I’m typing this, it’s occurring to me that, he
may have had a relationship with a woman, older than me, from central Cali who
I was supposed to pretend to be.
I’m glad I didn’t have to change my name as well, that would
have been really hard.
He had told me that he is a mama mama’s baby, one of the
reasons he wouldn’t have his mom live in a Nursing home. And had her and his
sister move in with him instead. He
told me, “now that you will be living with me, you will get a better feel of
who I am and how I treat women by seeing how I love and respect my mother. I
call her Sweetie Pie. On my off Days, I cook for her and take her for walks in
her wheel chair. Every now and again, I take her out for lunch to restaurants.
My mommy is spoiled!” Lucky mommy! Right?
We got out of the car, walked slowly towards the apartment.
It didn’t look as cute close by as it did the night we did a drive-by. He asked
me one last time to keep an open mind about the mess and to remember we are
going to sort it out together. He opened the door and BAM! In my face! Boxes
and Boxes of stuff, There was a huge mountain bike next to the big flat screen
tv his sister was watching, The aerial was slanting off, holding on for dear
life next to a tiny, blue, fake Christmas tree. Sister was sitting on a love
seat (two person couch) in front of the
tv with two cats, and mess all around her, there was a crutch near by too. I
remember hearing she is disabled. I guess that explains the Crutch. She was in
heels though! Go Figure! She has platinum blonde hair, with bangs, and was
dressed pretty cute, skinny jeans, high heeled ankle boots, and a nice top and
full make up on. The was more mess behind her love-seat, Mess, mess and more
mess. That place makes Perry’s house seem like a neat freak’s dream! It was
downright dirty! Forget ‘oh I’ve got too much stuff cos I moved from a four
bedroomed house to a two bed apartment!” Dude, that was ten years ago, quit
playing! Are you sh*tting me, right now! What the hell is this? No wonder you
didn’t want to bring me here, he opted to fight people, crying race to have
someone pay for a hotel bill you couldn’t afford just so you could hide this
mess you live in. What the heck! I thought I was being punked! His eyes were
focused on mine for a reaction, I just blurted out, WOWWWWWW! That project was
greater than me. They needed Niecey Nash up in there #CleanHouse. There isn’t
room to move the stuff to sort it out to sell it or anything. It’s a hoarder’s
paradise. And the dude won’t stop shopping! These are people who have two
storages over and above everything they have in the apartment. She has a huge one somewhere and the rest of
her stuff is in her van. Remember the van is her actual home, so she has things
going on there, tons of gallons of water and Lord knows what. El on the other
hand has his own storage in Hollywood and apparently more of his stuff is in
the sister’s storage and then his car, an SUV is packed with junk, just junk.
There are black bin bags in the back. I remember when he went to buy the cart
in San Diego, he didn’t have space to put it in, it was mission impossible. He
has bottles and bottles of Diet Pepsi in the pack, some full, some half full,
some empty, some full and ready to explode from heat. Good Grief!
I extended my hand to shake the sister’s. I noticed that she
has issues with her hand, the fingers are all crooked. She greeted me, and
offered me a seat in the love seat (lol, don’t I sound like Clarence Carter; I
got caught making love to another man’s wife). I was dressed all cute in my
knee high suede boots and a cute dress. I got concerned at that point. What
about my clothes! Are they gonna collect all this fluff, human hair and cat
fur! Yuck! I had to be polite, so I sat next to the sister, trying to remember
my script. So much pressure. El went over to the kitchen to drop the burgers.
He seemed quite ok with everything, so comfortable, so at ease! What must have
happened to someone’d head for them to be comfortable in that kind of
atmosphere? I have pictures, I will post them as soon as I have better internet
on a separate blogs with captions, to give you an idea. I am certain you will
agree with me!
The sister and got a little acquainted. Then it was time to
move on to the bedroom. He has an en-suite bathroom in the bedroom. It’s a two bed,
two bath apartment. He had told me before that his sister is using the second
bathroom as a Studio Apartment. That was supposed to be a jab at his sister, I
thought it was hilarious and not fair. I was yet to meet this person, and he
was already belittling her like that. Not cute. Especially for an almost fifty
year old single man, who has never married. No offence to people who have never
been married, I’ve never been married myself. The mess in the bedroom! It
looked like a moving truck, can you say U-Haul? Packed boxes all around,
against the wall, with enough space for the windows and then the bed was in the
centre of it all. There’s a Chest of Drawers with tons of receipts on it, TONS!
Coins, keys, measuring tapes. TWO of those! Remember when I asked him how big
it is and he told me, he didn’t have a measuring tape to measure it? #liar
The bathroom was surprisingly clean, it gave me a feeling I
was in a different house. The edge of the carpet between the bedroom and the
bathroom had come off, you know the steel thing they put there, to keep the
carpet down and to make sure you don’t trip? That came off, so the nails are
sticking out. You can’t see them because they are brown, so is the carpet, so
whenever I go to the bathroom, it’s Watch out! What out! Lmao, I can’t believe
this! Every now and then he will let me get poked by the nails and burst out
laughing. It’s comic relief for him to live in such an unhealthy, unsanitary environment.
Ugh! The bed was kinda made. With really nice linen.
Before he met, he had mentioned in passing that he his
barber had cut his ear a little bit when trimming his hair. He was still
recovering from that. I didn’t know why he told me that cos it was obviously
going to recover quickly. How bad could it be, right? Weeks later, we met, the
following morning, I saw blood on the pillows and freaked! I thought he was
bleeding through his ears or something! He was ever so nonchalant about it and
was like, oh yeah, that must be my ear. What the heck, when is this ear going
to recover? It had been a month already! Or longer!
There was no space anywhere for my stuff! I had three pieces
of luggage. And nowhere to put them. He told me he was going to buy me a chest
of drawers. AND PLACE IT WHERE, DUDE? There is a closet on the bedroom, full of
his clothes, which are surprisingly hung neatly. It had been a long day, I was
ready for bed. I couldn’t take anymore of that mess in (that’s what she said
haha).
He offered me something to eat, I couldn’t, I was in way
over my head, literally in this case! I just wanted to sleep.
It is too late to move back to Perry’s?